deepundergroundpoetry.com
Night Flight
I
Turbulence rattles us
but it's ok,
my book is strapped in.
It is tucked, closed and safe.
The cabin drops in darkness
with no frame of gravity
except for our rising buoyancy
and heart-rates.
Dull thuds hit the thin walls
but the blinking wing lights
fail to solve the mystery.
The elastic night stretches,
smoothly fitting our fears
in its cruel talons,
closing and climbing.
II
The heads are matted in dried blood.
Black clots thicken the hair and
the features are pulped as they hit
the fuselage.
Some are sucked into the engines,
rattling and shaking the doors
to Death's mansion.
Still they fall, in their hundreds.
III
"This is the captain.
Brace for impact."
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 8
reading list entries 1
comments 18
reads 1052
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re: Night Flight
8th Aug 2014 2:59pm
re: Re: Night Flight
10th Aug 2014 5:33am
Oops, forgot about the readers with fears of flying! Ummm, bonus chills?
Thanks for commenting, JeJe!
:)
Thanks for commenting, JeJe!
:)
Re: Night Flight
8th Aug 2014 3:55pm
oh man....I shouldn't have read this....I felt the gravity pull me at 35,000 feet!
This is why I need shots of Tequila before boarding a plane.
Nervous
This is why I need shots of Tequila before boarding a plane.
Nervous
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re: Re: Night Flight
10th Aug 2014 5:35am
Uh oh, another nervous flyer... thanks so much, Lena, for sharing your reaction to this, truly appreciate it!
Re: Night Flight
8th Aug 2014 8:45pm
Atakti, luv :-* ~
You do such an excellent job here, from the very first line, of letting us know that doom is quite imminent.
Anytime such care is taken with the book, it is nearly certain disaster will befall all humans. :-p
You have done an excellent, hauntingly gory, and exquisitely wrenching job of this, luv.
You do such an excellent job here, from the very first line, of letting us know that doom is quite imminent.
Anytime such care is taken with the book, it is nearly certain disaster will befall all humans. :-p
You have done an excellent, hauntingly gory, and exquisitely wrenching job of this, luv.
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re: Re: Night Flight
The book - yeah that book is pretty relevant. A dark read is fuel to the fire of imagination.
As a plot device, though, I hadn't noticed. It was more a distraction here, a human trait to first deny that something is off, or to control something small in a tense situation.
Thank you, Savaja, your comments are a delight.
As a plot device, though, I hadn't noticed. It was more a distraction here, a human trait to first deny that something is off, or to control something small in a tense situation.
Thank you, Savaja, your comments are a delight.
Re: Night Flight
9th Aug 2014 1:43am
Every plane ive been on feels and looks like a coffin to me...my fear worsens with every flight...I use to request window seats smile and watch storms from above....now I take Dramamine and keep a death grip on the armrest as I cringe to every sound of scraping metal turbulence provides-Thanks Atakti I just felt it again!!!
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re: Re: Night Flight
10th Aug 2014 5:42am
Hahaha, cheap thrills at an altitude of zero! You're welcome, lol...
I was not intending cruelty. If I was, I would show this to fearful passengers at 30,000 feet.
Thanks, Soul, for the giggle (I can't help it, this effect on some readers was unexpected).
I was not intending cruelty. If I was, I would show this to fearful passengers at 30,000 feet.
Thanks, Soul, for the giggle (I can't help it, this effect on some readers was unexpected).
Re: Night Flight
Anonymous
9th Aug 2014 5:10am
This is excellent work
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Re: Night Flight
Anonymous
9th Aug 2014 8:15am
You have really made this quite the script.
The pauses between the verses make it more strong.
Enjoyed the read!
The pauses between the verses make it more strong.
Enjoyed the read!
![Anonymous](/images/avatars/_nopicmini.gif)
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re: Re: Night Flight
10th Aug 2014 5:44am
Thanks, Mourganna. Yes, this time it felt right to break it up into its various settings — cabin, outside then cockpit.
Re: Night Flight
9th Aug 2014 12:20pm
The elastic night stretches,
smoothly fitting our fears
in its cruel talons,
closing and climbing.
... this stanza is a gem! Wonderfully descriptive work ... Palpable!
smoothly fitting our fears
in its cruel talons,
closing and climbing.
... this stanza is a gem! Wonderfully descriptive work ... Palpable!
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re: Re: Night Flight
10th Aug 2014 5:46am
Cheers, Lobo. This one was the metaphorical nod to terror, instead of plain descriptions. Felt right, so I'm glad someone noticed!
Thanks.
Thanks.
Re: Night Flight
Anonymous
9th Aug 2014 8:51pm
Swiss seat
Rm!!
Rm!!
![Anonymous](/images/avatars/_nopicmini.gif)
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re: Re: Night Flight
10th Aug 2014 5:48am
Swiss Air? Good airlines won't save you, just give you a more comfortable seat on the way down...
Thanks, RM!
Thanks, RM!
Re: Night Flight
I believe a famous Japanese author once said, "飛行機を避けることができない。苦しみはオプションです。" [Perhaps the google translation is wrong... I think it had something to do with pain, not a plane.]
I've done some flying lately and had my fair share of turbulence... the way your imagination and reasoning works is like poetic meditation. Inner tension is a beautiful thing when you can maserate it thru a jet engine.
"WTFooooooommmmmmmmmmmm!!!!"
Awesome stuff, Atakti!
I've done some flying lately and had my fair share of turbulence... the way your imagination and reasoning works is like poetic meditation. Inner tension is a beautiful thing when you can maserate it thru a jet engine.
"WTFooooooommmmmmmmmmmm!!!!"
Awesome stuff, Atakti!
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re: Re: Night Flight
12th Aug 2014 2:55am
Pain on a plane, random decapitations— nothing like a night flight to shake things up...
"Yarghhhhh!"
Cheers, Case. Your comments made me laugh.
多くのヘッドは、雨滴のように落ちる
"Yarghhhhh!"
Cheers, Case. Your comments made me laugh.
多くのヘッドは、雨滴のように落ちる