To My Pops

just want to say that I miss you like crazy, the words you have said still fly through my head and no matter what I find myself thinking of you. when you left this cruel world I thought I wanted you back. but I now know that you are much happier and it is very selfish to want to bring you back to all the pain that you were in. valentines day will never be the same, im even getting a broken heart with 1145 tattooed in the crack. I will never understand why you left when you did. but what I do understand is that you were my hero, the greatest man I will ever know. without you here is a constant war. you held our family together, you were the glue. since the day you left, we've been falling apart. i'll admit I ran away. but not out of fear, I ran to see if you would be able to show me if I did the right thing. I should've came around more then I did, maybe then I would've been able to see your smile more. you really were my world pops. you are never not on my mind and I pray that you are being as funny and happy as you were down here. until we meet again pops. I love you <3