Who Am I?

I spend hours wondering over one question; who am I?
People think they know me as that guy
You know, who writes rhymes and incorporates high fives into night time
Cause there’s a deep thing inside that roams around my mind and holds it all tight
But really deep down, I’m shy
I put on an act that implies I’m some sadistic hard guy and spill out some white lies
And who wants to live with that kind of life?
I changed my ways to gain these mates
Lost all focus on these grades
Some days I just want to fade into a lake and sail away
Or maybe get layered in chains so I can embrace the pain
I just can’t play this game, not going to be labelled a fake
Save it, mate
I can’t lie; going back I wish I could have stayed the same
And they would name me great because I’m not under Satan’s reign  
But people these days save their change
Just so they blaze some haze, and not to say that’s bad
But it’s just not for me
I’d rather bump a modern symphony
Blissfully see the steam rise out the machine as it makes me some British tea
Does that make me some frigging geek?
Just because I’m not a pretentious teens, who’s sipping lean in a weekly routine
I’m politely living my own dream, despite the fact it’s become riddled with lies
But the question remains, who am I?
That question hasn’t been answered but I will in time, but it’s not the person I have became