Escape

Today I want to hide
wrap myself in blankets
disappear

I fold in on myself
Hug my knees
it's not escape

but still it shuts the world
out
and though it doesn't
stop the pain,
at least for a moment
I feel safe.

I pull away from you
curl my arms around my knees
because, if you can see my face
How much more can you see?

How can you want me?
Just go away
leave me curled up in myself
Leave me safe.

Each time I turn away from you
it's my heart that I break
and even though I trust you I
guesse I don't feel safe

How long will you wait?
How long will you try
How long will you whisper gently,
dry my eyes?

I curl up so I don't drown in these waves
hold my self together
so I'm not suffocated by
the pleasure/Pain

wear does this fear come from
I trust you!
I know I'm safe!
but, I feel like
something caged and longing for escape