not sure what this is

I loved
I loved
more than humnan
could have loved
but it didnt
matter
why?
i raise my
hands
to the correctional
place
where my mother lies
my dead memories
die along with dad
who is not even dead
though i wish he would
I let my dragging cold heart
in the box
which i give to my lover
right before he leaves
surrender
its not at all what i am doing
but more as
letting go
i dont need a heart
why do i need it
for love
to be sweet and nice
please
what do i need memories
for
to return and continueously
replay them in my head
why do i need a mental hospital
so that they
can tell me im crazy
over and over agian
I dont need anything
just my computer
or phone
i cant do this
I dont know what to do
but I know I dont need this