Life is A War

Welcome to DUP--I hope that you find this community and outlet of expression something the helps you!  
Fav line
 "Athena tried to give me wisdom,
But it never reaches my thoughts."

Thanks!! And that is one of my favorite lines too!!

Oh my my how true this is
never stopping for anyone pain tht is inevitable never stops hurting we must continue to fight despite the pain. Awesome write

Yah...I wrote this when I was severely hurting inside and it is still true to me to this day :)

You need to stop putting in punctuation for the sake of it. It may look good to you, but we don't have the same internal monologue as you when you read it out, so the commas and fullstops are distracting and ruin the pacing. Linebreaks operate the same as a comma anyway, so most of the time they're redundant.

Other than that I did quite like this piece - the greek mythology twist on emotions was something I've rarely come across, so It's nice to see people playing away from the cliche's,

Thanks for the the help Jakki :) I really appreciate your feedback :)