Rock Bottom

I've not been in this game for as long as many.
Not even a year.
Some consider me a newbie.
Hell, who am I kidding? I AM a newbie.
At first I despised being thought about like that. Why did I want to be known as anything BUT that?
Maybe because I felt vulnerable; like I was seen as dumb to how this game works.
But today, I myself love to refer to myself as a newbie, not only because it's true, but because in reality I'm ahead of the game.
I've experienced a lot of fucked up shit this poison has caused.. Luckily I didn't only learn from my experiences, but I learned through the eyes of fellow tweakers as well.
I've thought I hit rock bottom.
Little did I know that rock bottom is a place I've been familiar with for quite some time; before all this shit.
I thought hitting rock bottom was simply inevitable, so I just floated down slowly, quietly, and didn't put up much of a fight.
But rock bottom isn't something you hit. Hitting rock bottom happens when you give up on yourself, give into the darkness this world is made of, and see anything at all as impossible for you to conquer.
Rock bottom is escapable.
To escape is rising above all the negativity, no matter the severity, and take away your option to give up.
I don't plan to spend the rest of my life wallowing in my fears and feeling like I'll never amount to anything. I refuse to give up on myself; thus my life finally begins.
I have the power to take myself anywhere I desire, and rock bottom? Not on my list.