unconquered depression

unconquered depression...
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As an unexpected, uninvited, miserable type of guest-
like a mucus pale green and drying outside the nose-
no one bothers knocking first ,
it just comes in when no one's home.

Messing up your brand new sheets,
staining pillows , driving me-
always somewhere new and painful-
always old and much more hateful-

Hallucinating images bleed...
the smell of pine from every need
you ever had or ever grew from
sucking dry the youth and then some.

Mandatory aching bones from effort in the mind of those
that think they can relate to me-
to install reason and help me see-

that life is always what we make it?
but what about the demons that take it?-
and roll that mock-up of some poor soul
trying hard just to .... they don't know...

So, I think about it,
read about it,
cry about it,
and laugh - its crowded...
Walking in museums with tapestries of the past
hanging on the walls of the memories in my grasp-
Delete is not an option to what disturbs the daily grind-
Peace is not forgotten - it is a dream I cannot find.