Dear sister

So you let them win
You dint fight.
just puffed the pain away.

But you dint see how you hurt me
You decided not to care.

For years i cried.
I hated you
But deep inside i need you,
Our dad died.
you tried to join him

Needles in your arm.
causing your self harm,
I snapped and left.
Like you left me

A week in hospital
But my scars are still deep
So  that i sat.
With the part of you i still keep

We were so close.
I wish you knew how much you made me cry.
All the time i left school in tears
Every time i did i wonder why
why you left
why snapped
why drugs

You left me when i need you most,
I guess ill never truly know.

You came back.
Then left.
The cravings got you.
Then again you came.
and left like the wind,

Now years later.
Your clean.
Your holding strong.
But when i hear you name
My emotions RAGE

Anger
Mournful
Amazed
Nothing
Dad
And joy.

Joy you back.
I missed you.
I guess that's why i cried.
Because when my dad......our dad
I need you.
But you also needed help
And im glad your getting it.
Even so late.

So sissy welcome back.
with i open arms and a heavy heart.
I love you