Emotional Eviction

I'm conscious afflicted,
The sconce isn't efficient
And isn't that wicked
That my wick was lit with
Honest intentions
The bondage of friendship
And now my system of control can't contain
The consuming flames
That felt good to the soul
I lost mind
Of temperature and time
Temperament and crime
Deafened and blind
Dumb to think
To sink
To assume
That the fire in the room
Heating the hands and warming the womb
Wouldn't catch the drapes
Seal a fate
Entrap me in doom
As she's wisked away
I inhale fumes
The cold of winter resumes
...press play
On the pitiful
Miserable
Shivering of physical ridicule
Emotional imprisionment
Due to drunken decisions
Causing collisions
Proving my wonderful elixar to be illicit liquid
Brought on by the derision
Of rejection that procedes forgiveness
How can a man take fire into his bosom and not be burned
How can my lesson not be learned
My messes not be spurned
Expecting confession to not be earned or won
But adjourned or expounged
Youthful foolishness
Believed to be exempt
Of universal laws
For commercial flaws
Partial philosophy
Possibly
Operating stictly on gall
You never asked what was in my cup
What my happy juice consists of
Liquor delivers a strong bitter taste
I wince and wish away
The sweet turned sour
Peace turned power
Weeds that feed on flowers
The desecration of ours
Turned into hours
Flashbacks of being lashed at
Too far for a last act
Of affection
Protecting my precious
Pride
With the epic lie
"That's cool"
Regret and then undoing
Letting you step and then pursuing
Letting you rest and settle
And level
Some of that wild emotion
Shroud commotion
And without knowing,
Letting you close everything that I've opened
Mild messages of hope that sate not
Escapes not
Waits not
Before indulging in a state of overwhelming emotion
I have been love blocked
Like love stops
After you've been love locked
Man, that's how you get blood clots
And it flows
Me saying, "release though"
No where to deposit,
No way to process or pocket
The product-
Of my highest vibration
It's drying and dying
Uninsured and reliant
on the nurture of surprises
And applying- the best of us
Lacking in presence and attendance
The ending of contracts and business
The yard grows in endless limits
But it's ok...no one visits
And please understand me
I know how it can be
Demanding
The nerve
Of my words
To ask you to understand
A man
That you can't relate to
Can't escape to
Save you
From a displaced you
I want to ...
Talk some sense in you
Invest expense in you
Repent and move
To redo
Reestablish a rental agreement
Sentimental appeasement
Reword our treaty
Because obviously
We need it
I'm facing eviction
How great a surprise that i'm filled with
The condition of the position
That I live in
When my possessions are still in
The land , the building
I'm due to vacate
Can't move to save face
So I played safe
But desperate for the fruit of promise
I'm bonded
And I can't run from it
I'm honest
In my responses
Leaving pride...I've done it
And woman...
Just a warning....
If you want to evict me
It's tricky and risky
Because I'm not leaving unconquered