The Mask is More Real than Reality

I used to cut my skin to feel
Everything I thought was real
The pain inside is too much to bear
I'd reach out, but nobodies there
My eyes downcast in self doubt
I can't explain what my fears are about
The lies in my head from memories past
Are not your concern so don't even ask
I hold this agony like a dear friend
These wounds have come open again
I cry and I scream inside my head
But my tongue holds words left unsaid
I stumble and falter, slip and fall
But nobody comes when I call
Bruise my knees, kneel and pray
To a God that hears nothing I say
Shout for an end, curse and repent
But none of this misery will ever relent
Begging for a release from self harm
Words never spoken are cause for alarm
Broken pieces of dreams stab within
I can't go on if I can't even begin
This is a taste of what's to come
Memories unfurl as the worlds undone
I'm upside down in this topsy turvy dream
Stuck in situations that aren't what they seem
Living a delusion that's better than reality
This blissful idea has taken ahold of me
I don't want to remove the veil from my eyes
I'd rather live a dream than keep living a lie