strawberry cough

I can't help thinking that after "the world is folding as always this time faster than the last" - it could benefit from some punctuation... A semi-colon maybe? I just think this would punch home and separate the next two lines, which in itself, is a statement.  
 
I like the introspection in this poem. This is in the love category which I find quite insightful. Although this drifts into the first person after the first stanza, so I wonder if this poem is more about yourself, rather than focus on another person/object/material. An observation, more than a physical act I suspect.  
 
I like the finishing stanza, wrapping up the idea of deception and misconstrued language. Sometimes, a reader doesn't have to understand a poem to know that the person was trying to communicate something meaningful.  
 
An intriguing read. It's like a puzzle that needs placing together. You have too read through it more than once.  
 
Thank you for the read.

well now that you mention it, I cant stop thinking on how to separate those first two thoughts...may just go ahead and take your semicolon advice...thank you very much on that thought



"Sometimes, a reader doesn't have to understand a poem to know that the person was trying to communicate something meaningful." I always hoped so, and goddamned if I aint happy you said it...seems like a ballsy stance to stand on its own, but the ideas behind this write might be recognized in that way on its best day...I am going through something meaningful but there are just not words to say it, yet that instinct to work it out on paper is equally if not more powerful.

prob confused myself... I thank you very much on your comments, gives me a vote of confidence as well as some things to think on...cheers!

i like my coffee like i like my women.
str8 black with lots of sugar....................

she had brown sugar
all over her booga wooga

I really love this... "how coffee tastes/on the other side" something about that line hooked me! Awesome writing.

thankyou