Derailled.

When I see, I mean, when I really study your eyes. I never gaze long enough. Cause I sure scare , no, not jumping too...what I have seen, witnessing you. The way you jump down on me.
Your words cut me, swishing cutlass, slicing, in my ears, brain, and heart, leaving my drowning heart only beats from shore.
    Such a pity, in fact it"s pretty shitty, how your words are turned to waste.
Silence scares me as I try to tip-toe among gardened tulips in the seized windmills of your mind.
    Tell me why? Why it"s so difficult to , don't even know what`s going on, can`t hear you no more, even when my ear hits the floor. This sure is one reflection iv`e seen too many times afore.
Always swimming up stream, never down with the flow.
     Cuttlasses wounds are healing now, pretty weak when you speak, de-sensitized I am becoming,
Does that mean? She`s broken through, could it be...I`m in love?
Doubt it very much, not in my fairytale, iv`e used my 3 wishes, should of smashed the "genie`s" lamp, set myself free. Wish I`d kept 1 wish for real.
     Verbally choking in my mind, not my heart, that`s entwined.
Barb wire protected, infected, so don't come near.
Seeing yesterdays teardrops today, makes me only run faster in my mind, another barrier goes up. Not too unkind?
    Not angry or resentful, was I what I expected? Anymore? I just don`t know. We tried and failed yet again.
Like a derailed train, never being on time with you again.