Hall of Sorrows

A dark hallway of broken dreams
The murals on the walls changing
Fading, moving, like a motion picture
Kaleidoscopic when I grow dizzy
Head spinning so fast I feel crazy

A hazy image of child pornography
Perhaps a manifestation of mind
Derived from tales I had been told  
Of being cleaned below like a puppy
As a baby, and I find it revolting

Random objects litter the floor
Things that were taken from me
A Shirley Temple movie collection
Stuffed animals here and there
Old relics from childhood everywhere

Noises come soaking through the walls
Like the tears that stained my pillows
When I cried myself to sleep at night
Feeling useless and afraid of him
When he blew up over a silly whim

Blood drips faintly from the ceiling
It's my own crimson, self inflicted
A past addiction in replay before me
A trigger-happy feeling creeps on
Desire to revisit the knife I'd overcome  

Broken glass in a smashed heap
Forming the shape of a red heart
From the times I shattered to pieces
I touch the memory and it comes alive
A vital, beating heart thumps a count of five

A stench like death itches my nose
Dead bodies of favored cats I lost
Some whole litters or scattered loners
A crazy cat lady's worst despair
To come to feed and a cat not be there

I trudge through the hall of sorrow
Trying to block out the reminiscing
I can't stop them from flooding me
Filling my mind with ache and pain
Opening old scars on a horrid memory lane

I become a ghost, floating and fading
Drifting slowly into nothingness
Consumed by the revival of heartache
Then I come upon the door out of here
Fumble at the knob nearly in tears

And I finally drift off to sleep