Numb paradise

"Stay possitive,
It's all in your head."
Easy for people to say,
My soul is already dead.
I walk along side this devil,
In a race that never ends.
I'm not sure how this all started,
But I sure wish it would end.
The feeling creeps up,
And I can't seem to resist.
"A pill to drain the shame"
Fuck me right? Relapsing, Ohh shit, not again.
But; It's all part of the game.
You can run away,
But there's no point.
When you always feel worthless,
It seems to be the cure.
Heartbreaks and headaches,
Only makes the feeling creep more.
You try to dig for something to stop it,
Then you're face to face,
Hand in hand with a monster to play.
Next you know,
Numbness is present,
You can't grip it,
As your soul fades away.