deepundergroundpoetry.com
A Dream, Its Just A Dream
You know how you have a dream and you KNOW you can wake yourself up but...you just...don’t know how to? Yeah its a scary dream...because when you first walk into your World Studies Class Room your like "Well I'm on break so I shouldn’t be here..." but as you sit down at your desk...you forget...
The desk felt oddly warm against my back as I sat scrunched over pieces of paper that were being past back. A progress report landed on my desk showing strait D's and all the comments of "Respectful and Doesn’t Bother The Class" Bullshit was crossed out...latterly with a red pen crossed out. I sat back in my chair and groaned at the sight of my low scores. I stood up and walked out. Something happened, something weird happened. It felt like a out of body experience but...the whole world seemed to fold like paper but I watched MYSELF fold like paper also...well I stood outside of some house. A man with blond hair and blue eyes was luring me into the house. How? I forgot how...but I walked in and something screamed to stop...it was a dog?! What the hell where did THAT come from?! It looked like some sort of pit bull, about the size of a...well in my dream I compared it to a treasure box? So in reality that’s like...a back Pack. Just not as wide and fat. But Alex (Yeah I got his name in my mind all of a sudden) yelled at it and it ran away. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the house. Like a stage of a play, it blacked out, everything folded in like paper and I was outside on the steps holding the dog. There was a pain...a pain...down there...and I cried. I was crying so hard. It hurt, my body hurt, everything hurt. Bruises and blood lined the body parts I could see. But also being able to see the out look of everything I saw my body was covered in bruises and blood...Again with the weird angles of how I'm seeing this let me explain. Yes I am still in the body of Dahlia, Yes I can still feel her pain but all at the same time I can see what’s going on around like I’m floating from the sky...get it? No? Just pretend I have a pair of eyes in my head and one above me like a camera. Anyway the dog sat in my lap and I felt like I had some connection with it...some...I don’t know. But as I stared into those never ending eyes full of black I realized why everything hurt, why I was crying, why Alex had drug me in...I was raped. I stood up almost swaying and looked around. Everything was unfamiliar...I needed somewhere to stay...I need a new life...I need...the dog jumped from my arms and ran across the street. My ONLY friend just DITCHED me! I ran after him. But something I noticed that if I started to fall behind, little by little he slowed just barley...He took me back to the High school where I stood staring at it dumbly. I watched the school, the dog, and myself fall like paper and black out. I was in the hallway of my elementary school. As I child I had gone to many elementary schools due to moving and the divorce so I was at the 2nd one I had moved to. I was in front of my third grade class and it seemed we were all waiting to get inside. I stood there shyly and my hands gripped the strap of my notebook when I was Alex walk by. He stood at the door, nothing seemed to bother him that I was glaring right at him. I brushed the biggest bruise that seemed to line my right arm and a kid with short brown hair, blue green eyes, and super long skinny legs walked over and hugged me. His voice was low yet comforting..."I'm so sorry..." he said. I also had a strong past with this guy like I had with he dog...his name was...Aden. I let out a small groan from the way he pressed against my bruises and automatically, as though he knew where each one was, he pulled his long arms back so he wasn’t touching them yet he still held me. "It's ok...it's ok" I relaxed a little and wondered if this was my boyfriend. Future Ray? Or maybe in this dream Ray doesn’t exist. I heard commotion and I turned around in Aden’s arms and he let go and looked away shyly "Sorry..." and speak of the devil. There was ray running for some reason and just knocking kids down. He stopped and at least 3 people saw him and walked over to him to talk. I stood there because I felt the sudden pain of Alex...and the way he had raped me. I didn’t want to do anything but stand there and wallow in my misery...I wanted Aden to hold me again...not specifically Aden I just...I want someone to hold me. I felt a memory flash through me of him and his girlfriend. She was...really ugly. Like...oh my god...He can do better then THAT! But I guess it shows how much he's in love...well he held out a present but she seemed to kind of prance off. It was like...'She’s not really into that romance but I love it...' He said looking at me with sad eyes. I nodded. 'I'm a sucker for romance too." I said. "But not everyone is you know." We were sitting on a stonewall staring off at a lake. He held a basket of roses and candy and all this stuff for his girlfriend. Rings, necklaces, everything. I held the dog. My pit bull. Didn’t name it. It was just 'Dog'. "How’s your research going?" He asked "Good" What am I researching..? I was almost thrown from my own body and I floated above staring down at myself. "I heard there’s some animal place around here but...no one in this god forsaken town knows where it is. And you know with the bad economy there’s no easy transportation." What the hell? Everything folded in and black out and I was standing in front of my classroom again. I saw Ray and some Mexican Girl getting a little close and Aden stared at them too. I jumped behind him hiding, though he was bony he had a jacket and he stretched out so it created a curtain so I could hide behind it. I peaked out just in time to see Ray and that chick kiss. Fuck...I thought. Fuck fuck fuck...you know who she is? Special connection with her...I think she's my best friend. I stood up and the bruises seemed to ache more from the surprise and sadness I felt. I ran. I ran. Aden yelled after me, Ray didn’t notice, my best friend stood there dumbly. Steve flashed through my mind, Steve this is a dream! Steve you’re giving me these dreams! Steve why'd you do that? Why did you haunt me? Why did you do this in real life and now I lost trust for everything and anyone!? Why why why....I forgot this was all a dream...Why Ray why?! I walked into some closet and pulled out something from my pocket. Ray's ipod, I started a new note thing and began to write my suicide note.
"I hate when people start out their suicide note "By The Time You Read This...." It makes me angry so. Maybe when you read this, I'll still be alive, twitching on the ground. Maybe the life will just be leaving my body, maybe I will just start to fade with the last image being your face. I hope its you Ray...I'm not going to make this a mystery, you cheated on me and as promised I killed myself. I want the whole school to know this, that’s my dieing wish. Oh and I want them to know Alex, yeah he raped me and Aden? Yeah you treat him like a mother fucking god. But anyway, I hope your raging dick got what it wanted Steve.
XOXO
YourBlackDahlia"
Steve? Who the hell...
I woke up to my phone going off. A text from Ray: Camilllle then another: I love you~ -eats bag of chips-
...It's just a dream...It's just a dream.
The desk felt oddly warm against my back as I sat scrunched over pieces of paper that were being past back. A progress report landed on my desk showing strait D's and all the comments of "Respectful and Doesn’t Bother The Class" Bullshit was crossed out...latterly with a red pen crossed out. I sat back in my chair and groaned at the sight of my low scores. I stood up and walked out. Something happened, something weird happened. It felt like a out of body experience but...the whole world seemed to fold like paper but I watched MYSELF fold like paper also...well I stood outside of some house. A man with blond hair and blue eyes was luring me into the house. How? I forgot how...but I walked in and something screamed to stop...it was a dog?! What the hell where did THAT come from?! It looked like some sort of pit bull, about the size of a...well in my dream I compared it to a treasure box? So in reality that’s like...a back Pack. Just not as wide and fat. But Alex (Yeah I got his name in my mind all of a sudden) yelled at it and it ran away. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the house. Like a stage of a play, it blacked out, everything folded in like paper and I was outside on the steps holding the dog. There was a pain...a pain...down there...and I cried. I was crying so hard. It hurt, my body hurt, everything hurt. Bruises and blood lined the body parts I could see. But also being able to see the out look of everything I saw my body was covered in bruises and blood...Again with the weird angles of how I'm seeing this let me explain. Yes I am still in the body of Dahlia, Yes I can still feel her pain but all at the same time I can see what’s going on around like I’m floating from the sky...get it? No? Just pretend I have a pair of eyes in my head and one above me like a camera. Anyway the dog sat in my lap and I felt like I had some connection with it...some...I don’t know. But as I stared into those never ending eyes full of black I realized why everything hurt, why I was crying, why Alex had drug me in...I was raped. I stood up almost swaying and looked around. Everything was unfamiliar...I needed somewhere to stay...I need a new life...I need...the dog jumped from my arms and ran across the street. My ONLY friend just DITCHED me! I ran after him. But something I noticed that if I started to fall behind, little by little he slowed just barley...He took me back to the High school where I stood staring at it dumbly. I watched the school, the dog, and myself fall like paper and black out. I was in the hallway of my elementary school. As I child I had gone to many elementary schools due to moving and the divorce so I was at the 2nd one I had moved to. I was in front of my third grade class and it seemed we were all waiting to get inside. I stood there shyly and my hands gripped the strap of my notebook when I was Alex walk by. He stood at the door, nothing seemed to bother him that I was glaring right at him. I brushed the biggest bruise that seemed to line my right arm and a kid with short brown hair, blue green eyes, and super long skinny legs walked over and hugged me. His voice was low yet comforting..."I'm so sorry..." he said. I also had a strong past with this guy like I had with he dog...his name was...Aden. I let out a small groan from the way he pressed against my bruises and automatically, as though he knew where each one was, he pulled his long arms back so he wasn’t touching them yet he still held me. "It's ok...it's ok" I relaxed a little and wondered if this was my boyfriend. Future Ray? Or maybe in this dream Ray doesn’t exist. I heard commotion and I turned around in Aden’s arms and he let go and looked away shyly "Sorry..." and speak of the devil. There was ray running for some reason and just knocking kids down. He stopped and at least 3 people saw him and walked over to him to talk. I stood there because I felt the sudden pain of Alex...and the way he had raped me. I didn’t want to do anything but stand there and wallow in my misery...I wanted Aden to hold me again...not specifically Aden I just...I want someone to hold me. I felt a memory flash through me of him and his girlfriend. She was...really ugly. Like...oh my god...He can do better then THAT! But I guess it shows how much he's in love...well he held out a present but she seemed to kind of prance off. It was like...'She’s not really into that romance but I love it...' He said looking at me with sad eyes. I nodded. 'I'm a sucker for romance too." I said. "But not everyone is you know." We were sitting on a stonewall staring off at a lake. He held a basket of roses and candy and all this stuff for his girlfriend. Rings, necklaces, everything. I held the dog. My pit bull. Didn’t name it. It was just 'Dog'. "How’s your research going?" He asked "Good" What am I researching..? I was almost thrown from my own body and I floated above staring down at myself. "I heard there’s some animal place around here but...no one in this god forsaken town knows where it is. And you know with the bad economy there’s no easy transportation." What the hell? Everything folded in and black out and I was standing in front of my classroom again. I saw Ray and some Mexican Girl getting a little close and Aden stared at them too. I jumped behind him hiding, though he was bony he had a jacket and he stretched out so it created a curtain so I could hide behind it. I peaked out just in time to see Ray and that chick kiss. Fuck...I thought. Fuck fuck fuck...you know who she is? Special connection with her...I think she's my best friend. I stood up and the bruises seemed to ache more from the surprise and sadness I felt. I ran. I ran. Aden yelled after me, Ray didn’t notice, my best friend stood there dumbly. Steve flashed through my mind, Steve this is a dream! Steve you’re giving me these dreams! Steve why'd you do that? Why did you haunt me? Why did you do this in real life and now I lost trust for everything and anyone!? Why why why....I forgot this was all a dream...Why Ray why?! I walked into some closet and pulled out something from my pocket. Ray's ipod, I started a new note thing and began to write my suicide note.
"I hate when people start out their suicide note "By The Time You Read This...." It makes me angry so. Maybe when you read this, I'll still be alive, twitching on the ground. Maybe the life will just be leaving my body, maybe I will just start to fade with the last image being your face. I hope its you Ray...I'm not going to make this a mystery, you cheated on me and as promised I killed myself. I want the whole school to know this, that’s my dieing wish. Oh and I want them to know Alex, yeah he raped me and Aden? Yeah you treat him like a mother fucking god. But anyway, I hope your raging dick got what it wanted Steve.
XOXO
YourBlackDahlia"
Steve? Who the hell...
I woke up to my phone going off. A text from Ray: Camilllle then another: I love you~ -eats bag of chips-
...It's just a dream...It's just a dream.
Published 24th Nov 2010
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24th Nov 2010 7:50pm
It's ok it was just a dream beautiful. Don't worry. I love only u and no one else
Anonymous
30th Apr 2011 4:46am
<< post removed >>
5th May 2011 1:21am
