A Letter to Cousin

Dear Cousin,

     My inners feel as if it is slowly but surely being degraded into a bowl of thick, liquid acid.
 My heart as if it's tripping on ladybugs, and consumed with the filth that surrounds it. My nerves have shattered completely, never unaware, always alert. It messes with my head in so many ways, it pains me to even begin to describe how it completely repaints my view. My cousin, my dearest friend, I am in deep need of a way out, but I can't seem to find it. No one seems to understand, because I know they won't and never will. 
       We climb mountains from molehills and where to we end up? At the bottom of the trenches of which the mountain begins, and we float breathless in the empty blackness of the depths. Oh cousin, my closest cousin, our lifes are so similar, yet slghtly off. I know you'd  take a bullet or two, and I would too, which reassures my lonelyness. But once that/those bullets are taken, what am I to do? If you don't return, how will I survive? It's a cycle, my friend, an endless one at that. My life is not one I wish to serve, but with you it's worth a laugh or two. And here is this letter to thank you. I'll see you when I can, and we will cause what we do best, and will continue with a number of laughs.

Sincerely,
X_______ ______