pain

You have the beginning of a fine poem here.  This is not negativity, just my perspective.  For instance, why did you not capitalize the title, "Pain?"  Not doing so, when your capitalization within the poem is consistent, correct, diminishes  the "pain" expressed within the poem.  Finally, for what it's worth (probably not much):  the last stanza doesn't quite make sense, nor get at what you probably want to poetically communicate.  I realize your talent for interchanging types of "pain."  Yet "a sharp razor" cut produces undiminished, uncontrollable "pain" that cannot be stopped as quickly as your poem suggests.  My remarks may make you think I do not like your poem.  That would be wrong.  I like it but feel you have some clarity and tightening of your image which would make it even a better poem.  I'm just trying to be helpful, not hurtful.  Please take these criticisms with that in mind.  To put it another way: you have written a fairly good poem which could even be better, because you do have talent.

marcella1

Thanks:) I get what your saying. It just needs some adjustments to make it better:)