Never Have I Ever

I never wanted the life i have
always lurking in the shadows
Hating myself because of the past
and never expecting the rainbows
I always blamed myself when i
couldn't express them to other people
I'm not an open book
Some weak spots but no peep hole
Devil in my head while I'm killing myself
Never really planned for this to happen but i don't care about my health
Mysterious as it is
I'm really not that intriguing
more like weird in a sense
but that all ending when i sprouted from a seedling
Came from SC with my grandma all the time
Riding ponies and feeding chickens
and i never dropped not one dime
Never thought about the world
until i was snatched by the one we all sometimes call mom
the one who took my money, my patience and my time
But now I'm here sharing my poems aren't I
But now i understand that being real is societies definition of a crime