Happy Anniversary

It's June 
A year later
Pain only worsened 
Images grew darker
One of demons
Carved on my ribs
Burned into my brain
A life long curse

It's June 
And all I can think of
Is my failure to save you
Save you from the end
I'd give anything to go back 
Fuck that whole
"Shit happens for a reason"

It's June 
And I am selfish
Trade the world?
Done
Revive hitler? 
Done
Give my soul to Lucy?
Done

It's June 
And suffering an eternity in hell
Sounds better than one more day
On this god forsaken planet without you
Because I'm lost

It's June 
A year later
The pain still hurts
The tears still leak
My heart still whimpers
The dark still grows
Engulfing my fragile being

It's June 
Life hasn't gotten easier
My lungs are still struggling
My organs barely working
My depression wishing; hoping
That one day soon 
I stop fighting it
And take my pills
Tie the noose 
Cut along the veins
Jump from the cliff
Drown in the lake
And suffocate my memories
The
Good 
The 
Bad
The 
Dark
And the agonizing

Because
It's June 
And you're not the only one
Who has been dead for a year