deepundergroundpoetry.com
Don't
DON'T slap me.
DON'T punch me.
DON'T pull my hair.
DON'T kick me.
DON'T verbally, mentally, or sexually abuse me,
even though you think it's easy.
You beat my brother; fucked him too.
You think he's weak and a sissy.
You put him down, beat him to the ground,
call him a faggot and prissy.
WE HATE YOU.
WE DESPISE YOU.
I want to grab a gun or knife and KILL YOU.
You victimized an innocent boy.
Used him as nothing but a sex toy.
I DON'T care what you did to me
but why couldn't you let my baby brother be?
I WANT TO FLAY YOU.
Slice off pieces of your skin,
starting with your dick.
But un-like you, you son-of-a-bitch,
I'm just not that sick.
In the end it all comes down to Karma.
Then what the hell will you do?
What goes around comes around,
You dirty bastard.
Buddha's watching you.
DON'T punch me.
DON'T pull my hair.
DON'T kick me.
DON'T verbally, mentally, or sexually abuse me,
even though you think it's easy.
You beat my brother; fucked him too.
You think he's weak and a sissy.
You put him down, beat him to the ground,
call him a faggot and prissy.
WE HATE YOU.
WE DESPISE YOU.
I want to grab a gun or knife and KILL YOU.
You victimized an innocent boy.
Used him as nothing but a sex toy.
I DON'T care what you did to me
but why couldn't you let my baby brother be?
I WANT TO FLAY YOU.
Slice off pieces of your skin,
starting with your dick.
But un-like you, you son-of-a-bitch,
I'm just not that sick.
In the end it all comes down to Karma.
Then what the hell will you do?
What goes around comes around,
You dirty bastard.
Buddha's watching you.
Published 31st May 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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The author encourages honest critique.
2nd Jun 2013 8:20pm
Wow. Stunning. Very strong, I can FEEL the anger and hatred your poem exudes. You language is rough, it's explicit, it gets straight to the point.
But I feel I actually know the narrator. I feel she's hurt, she's angry, I can sense how much she wants to rip apart the object of the poem... but I can also tell she's a good person, a protector.. beautiful. You've nailed one thing that's often ignored in poetry: the character. Albeit, most poems don't have a character, many that do ignore the character and favor the message. Wonderful work.
Keep it up!
But I feel I actually know the narrator. I feel she's hurt, she's angry, I can sense how much she wants to rip apart the object of the poem... but I can also tell she's a good person, a protector.. beautiful. You've nailed one thing that's often ignored in poetry: the character. Albeit, most poems don't have a character, many that do ignore the character and favor the message. Wonderful work.
Keep it up!
3rd Jun 2013 12:23pm
Izzi, thanks so much for the comments. I have been have a crisis of self-doubt about my writing ability so your words mean a lot. It is supposed to be angry and shocking. I am glad you like it.
