deepundergroundpoetry.com
Secret Night Pleasures
The moon is out, the house is quiet
And they are all asleep at last
And over in my bedroom drawer
My dildo waits
Published 27th Apr 2013
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likes 6
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comments 6
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The author encourages honest critique.
27th Apr 2013 5:15am
You have to love the "BOB" (Battery Operated boyfriend)!! Nice! My wife loved!!
27th Apr 2013 5:15am
I love little poems, the smack to the point writes are my fave...
I'm wondering though, do you need the two "And" in L2 & L3? just a thought. I use "And" a lot, it just seems it slows the write a bit here and g-d knows you want to get there quickly.
Nice stuff!
Al
I'm wondering though, do you need the two "And" in L2 & L3? just a thought. I use "And" a lot, it just seems it slows the write a bit here and g-d knows you want to get there quickly.
Nice stuff!
Al
27th Apr 2013 5:19am
Good point. You could be right. I like little poems too. It is an attempt at a sapphic ode - 3 lines of iambic tetrameter and one line of iambic dimeter to finish.
M
M
Anonymous
29th Apr 2013 3:32pm
emmastg,
Ah yes, the anticipation of an oh so close release ; ) Enjoyed!
tornado
Ah yes, the anticipation of an oh so close release ; ) Enjoyed!
tornado
8th Mar 2014 3:13am
Love how the title fits the piece!!
Great write and read!!
Sir Lancelott
visit sometime
Great write and read!!
Sir Lancelott
visit sometime
Anonymous
- Edited 7th Sep 2022 7:45pm
11th Dec 2018 11:35am
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