deepundergroundpoetry.com
if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
I'm the redemption of a principle of rebellion,
encompassing the in-between of a fast and forever expanding everything.
I'm the payment, paid in full, but past due
of all future movement.(although I may have robbed Peter to do it).
I'm the arousal of a single point to form lines, then letters, to incite riots,
the diet of a pristine parasitic existence.
I'm the personification of the pushed panic button,
the utter detachment, and the bum-rush to the escape hatch.
A latch key kid of a rolling stone,
I am the OM (A-U-M) with Tourette's syndrome,
intoning every conceivable perverted reverberation of creation.
Every monster, mutant and orchestrated mastery
owes to me its moment of self discovery.
In short,
I'm the karmic retribution of entropy that broke bad.
I'm the price of boredom,
I'm the bellows and brimstone and bedlam, but beauty,
of that initial yet infinite un-acceptance of non-being.
I'm the unscripted dialogue for the actors practicing for the reenactment of the big bang,
but backwards.
Inside every syllable, whether communicated or confused,
is a stowed away seedling of me.
Every contrived "truth","reason" and "meaning",
will eventually shed its clothing
a naked prey
to my needing.
note: this is a reworked older piece. Actually it was one of the first pieces that I submitted here on DU. Jestalessa had done an audio recording for this which is awesome (as is per par for her, she lends a great voice to any write), and i will try to attach the link for it
encompassing the in-between of a fast and forever expanding everything.
I'm the payment, paid in full, but past due
of all future movement.(although I may have robbed Peter to do it).
I'm the arousal of a single point to form lines, then letters, to incite riots,
the diet of a pristine parasitic existence.
I'm the personification of the pushed panic button,
the utter detachment, and the bum-rush to the escape hatch.
A latch key kid of a rolling stone,
I am the OM (A-U-M) with Tourette's syndrome,
intoning every conceivable perverted reverberation of creation.
Every monster, mutant and orchestrated mastery
owes to me its moment of self discovery.
In short,
I'm the karmic retribution of entropy that broke bad.
I'm the price of boredom,
I'm the bellows and brimstone and bedlam, but beauty,
of that initial yet infinite un-acceptance of non-being.
I'm the unscripted dialogue for the actors practicing for the reenactment of the big bang,
but backwards.
Inside every syllable, whether communicated or confused,
is a stowed away seedling of me.
Every contrived "truth","reason" and "meaning",
will eventually shed its clothing
a naked prey
to my needing.
note: this is a reworked older piece. Actually it was one of the first pieces that I submitted here on DU. Jestalessa had done an audio recording for this which is awesome (as is per par for her, she lends a great voice to any write), and i will try to attach the link for it
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comments 19
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Re: if the thunder don't get you,then the lightning will
Anonymous
8th Apr 2013 7:24pm
This is really great, so much to ponder from the thought provoking lines.
Great pen Lb
Great pen Lb
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re: Re: if the thunder don't get you,then the lightning will
8th Apr 2013 7:38pm
awesome Miki...so glad to hear that it got you pondering a bit, thank you much
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
8th Apr 2013 7:43pm
well, I haven't figured out yet how to add the recording. (it tells me that I don't have a legitimate youtube address...hmm,dunno?)
but she does such a lovely job, that I feel funny not leaving some sort of link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHNEF6QzJS0
but she does such a lovely job, that I feel funny not leaving some sort of link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHNEF6QzJS0
re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
Anonymous
8th Apr 2013 8:18pm
Jesta did one of mine while back and I had the same error when trying to post the link with my poem, never did get it to work :-(
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Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
8th Apr 2013 7:44pm
my faaaaavourite to this day; i still get a rush from reading it aloud. looks pretty with its new facelift. [:
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re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
9th Apr 2013 11:43pm
hey J. your comments when I first posted this, and then doing the reading meant a lot to me when I first started hanging around, here at the ol' DU...you were one of the first friendly people I met around here, and for you also to be such a great writer willing to have discussions, signaled a lot for me in terms of the quality of peers you could find here.
so glad you had swung by, and thanks for everything.
glad also that you noticed the facelift.
cheers jesta, hope all is well!
so glad you had swung by, and thanks for everything.
glad also that you noticed the facelift.
cheers jesta, hope all is well!
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
8th Apr 2013 8:14pm
this is fantastic lb...whether it was your intent or the non stop metronome and constant notions of cryptic verbal melodic accompaniment in my head, i see a anti norm type of flow here that i'm sure would be hella trippy ish on a beat. if i was to interpret as strictly just a "read" i think one more "i am" or "i'm the" in closing would create complete symmetry for me. just the aesthetic of self description to follow through with the previous format.
all just preferences and ideas here man. your craft is yours and style unlike any other which i am def diggin...
fanfntastic tho man. i am now on a search for miss jestalessa" recital....
all just preferences and ideas here man. your craft is yours and style unlike any other which i am def diggin...
fanfntastic tho man. i am now on a search for miss jestalessa" recital....
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re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
9th Apr 2013 11:52pm
thanks a lot jr.
(Oh and certainly look up Jesta's readings...she lends a really great voice to anything she reads...i'll send a link, then you can kinda just bop around her youtube stuff. def worth lookin around)
appreciate yours thoughts man...I have considered putting this on a beat of sorts, or at least using this as a framework and expanding on it...thanks again man, cheers!
(Oh and certainly look up Jesta's readings...she lends a really great voice to anything she reads...i'll send a link, then you can kinda just bop around her youtube stuff. def worth lookin around)
appreciate yours thoughts man...I have considered putting this on a beat of sorts, or at least using this as a framework and expanding on it...thanks again man, cheers!
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
Anonymous
8th Apr 2013 9:06pm
profound thinking here lightbaron
strider...
strider...
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re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
9th Apr 2013 11:53pm
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
8th Apr 2013 10:07pm
Lb rolling freely...liked it the first time and like it again now...aint it interesting to find an older work that still 'works', when we are trying so hard to evolve our writing....always a pleasure, and a reminder sometimes to switch off and just do it....perhaps the only skills we really do gain are to edit, and the rest is just what it is...fuck knows, but good luck to you son :-)
hh
hh
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re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
9th Apr 2013 11:56pm
nice, glad it worked this time around too Hemi.
Like Jesta, you too were one of the earlier people I bumped into 'round here that offered suggestions and interest in working on writes...meant a lot, and still does...thank ya sir
cheers!
Like Jesta, you too were one of the earlier people I bumped into 'round here that offered suggestions and interest in working on writes...meant a lot, and still does...thank ya sir
cheers!
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
8th Apr 2013 11:31pm
Great write LB! Sparked deep thought while reading. Again nice write. Thank you for sharing
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re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
9th Apr 2013 11:57pm
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
Anonymous
9th Apr 2013 9:25am
You really should do this slam style.
I am damn jealous, so now I'm going to post a somewhat-what-but-not-really-red-headed-step-sister-type-thing.
Oh yeah, you rock :)
I am damn jealous, so now I'm going to post a somewhat-what-but-not-really-red-headed-step-sister-type-thing.
Oh yeah, you rock :)
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As an aside...
Anonymous
9th Apr 2013 9:28am
Did you know most flora and fauna absorb nutrients released by thunder claps and lightning strikes?
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re: As an aside...
10th Apr 2013 00:05am
I did not know that...that is pretty goddamned groovy though, thanks for that lovely nugget.
ah, you rock..haha, well, the jealous thing could be good, I look forward to seeing what you pull out of your hat
eh, I have a bunch of shit to say, but i'll keep it to messages...look forward to catching up, which i'm sure we'll do soon
cheers m'dear!
ah, you rock..haha, well, the jealous thing could be good, I look forward to seeing what you pull out of your hat
eh, I have a bunch of shit to say, but i'll keep it to messages...look forward to catching up, which i'm sure we'll do soon
cheers m'dear!
Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
9th Apr 2013 4:42pm
*smiling*
LB
I think I have told you before (I know me, and Mr. Rot have discussed this, which btw is the little birdie who told me to stop what I was doing and read this. lol) that as a middle aged woman I am not totally familiar with rap, and slam.
Doesn't mean I don't know a pretty good one when I hear it. lol You made me "know" the beat of this. I don't think many realize the talent, and work it takes to, through a silent craft, create an actual heard rhythm. You did that hear Darlin.
You got some damn fine stuff going on LB, and your progression in the craft is shining my friend.
LB
I think I have told you before (I know me, and Mr. Rot have discussed this, which btw is the little birdie who told me to stop what I was doing and read this. lol) that as a middle aged woman I am not totally familiar with rap, and slam.
Doesn't mean I don't know a pretty good one when I hear it. lol You made me "know" the beat of this. I don't think many realize the talent, and work it takes to, through a silent craft, create an actual heard rhythm. You did that hear Darlin.
You got some damn fine stuff going on LB, and your progression in the craft is shining my friend.
0
re: Re: if the thunder don't get you, then the lightning will
10th Apr 2013 9:40pm
excellent!
I have a strong hip hop background, and was writing rap "songs" before I had gotten into "poetry".
This piece, I think is an interesting in-betweener, in that I still have a lot of same idea of rhyme scheme and that "heard beat" you mentioned (which I totally agree is hard to write in), but I started freeing myself up from a tight bar structure...when I left the "rap" writing thing, I never necessarily lost interest in rhyming poetry, but having a hip hop background, my argument has been that I think a lot of rhyming poetry is boring, because it is so simple, and lacks some of the complexity that is available.. I digress, it doesn't matter
ah man, thank you so much on the craft shine comment, means a whole bunch coming from ya...thanks a ton or more toots!
I have a strong hip hop background, and was writing rap "songs" before I had gotten into "poetry".
This piece, I think is an interesting in-betweener, in that I still have a lot of same idea of rhyme scheme and that "heard beat" you mentioned (which I totally agree is hard to write in), but I started freeing myself up from a tight bar structure...when I left the "rap" writing thing, I never necessarily lost interest in rhyming poetry, but having a hip hop background, my argument has been that I think a lot of rhyming poetry is boring, because it is so simple, and lacks some of the complexity that is available.. I digress, it doesn't matter
ah man, thank you so much on the craft shine comment, means a whole bunch coming from ya...thanks a ton or more toots!