Submissions by diablia363 (Alisha Ranstrom)
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Poet Introduction
diablia363 aka alisha I've been to nowhere and everywhere at same time ,I've felt so lost and silent. Until someone gave me deep underground on which to purge my thoughts spewing them from the depths of my mind..laying them out for others like me to find.
SELF POEM
Published
20th Sep 2015 2:48am
20th Sep 2015 2:48am
Don't even see her
Time is no friend of mine
You are all grown up now
St ageing down the hill now not quite over it
My life has had no meaning
Felt so fucking lost and cold
Been seeing this future foretold
Addiction ever calling whispering
In the ears of my sorrow
Nothing is promised not even tomorrow
I look in the eyes of the face in the mirror
And where have I gone
I don't even see her
I'm so differant to my eyes now
I've lost my confidence some how
You are all grown up now
St ageing down the hill now not quite over it
My life has had no meaning
Felt so fucking lost and cold
Been seeing this future foretold
Addiction ever calling whispering
In the ears of my sorrow
Nothing is promised not even tomorrow
I look in the eyes of the face in the mirror
And where have I gone
I don't even see her
I'm so differant to my eyes now
I've lost my confidence some how
524 reads
1 Comment
DRUGS POEM
Published
18th Sep 2015 2:28pm
18th Sep 2015 2:28pm
The sounds of silence
Wake at midnight outta bed like it's morning
Feel alive my clock all fucked off
Just as my happiness dwindles
Like the clouds overcome the sun
Running this race nobody has ever won
I'm over this shit I think I'm finally fucking done
Trying to untangle myself
I'm failing miserably sober
But definately not clean in my recovery
Somehow without drugs I lose my humanity
A flattening of feeling shcitzo
Or dead inside
I really can't tell I just know
I'm neither happy nor sad
I do not feel good or bad
I don't miss the chaos of the life I...
Feel alive my clock all fucked off
Just as my happiness dwindles
Like the clouds overcome the sun
Running this race nobody has ever won
I'm over this shit I think I'm finally fucking done
Trying to untangle myself
I'm failing miserably sober
But definately not clean in my recovery
Somehow without drugs I lose my humanity
A flattening of feeling shcitzo
Or dead inside
I really can't tell I just know
I'm neither happy nor sad
I do not feel good or bad
I don't miss the chaos of the life I...
705 reads
2 Comments
SELF POEM
Published
12th Sep 2015 12:55pm
12th Sep 2015 12:55pm
Painful realities
I can't seem to breathe
Is it just me or is the air
Too toxic choking on the lies
I'm sorry ahead of time
I'm lost a girl gone
Where is the will to continue on
I've been down before
But somehow this burden is heavier
I'm not proud of what I'm doing
But it's a nessessity
not in my character
At least not in adulthood
I try to fake a smile when all I
Feel is depressed .
Is there a noticeable weight
On my heavy chest
I have nothing of fire
No zeal no desire
Yet I feel am I even breathing still
This sad disposition...
Is it just me or is the air
Too toxic choking on the lies
I'm sorry ahead of time
I'm lost a girl gone
Where is the will to continue on
I've been down before
But somehow this burden is heavier
I'm not proud of what I'm doing
But it's a nessessity
not in my character
At least not in adulthood
I try to fake a smile when all I
Feel is depressed .
Is there a noticeable weight
On my heavy chest
I have nothing of fire
No zeal no desire
Yet I feel am I even breathing still
This sad disposition...
569 reads
1 Comment
SELF POEM
Published
4th Sep 2015 4:14am
4th Sep 2015 4:14am
The storm rages on c,seerrrr4e
Disciples of hatred
Born and bread
To die young
Too insane to care
Running dirty hands through hair
Dirt on your cleanest face
Smiling with tears cascading
Mascara trails to your broken heart
You stand on fire ,
But drowning in waters of despair
Why is reality so unfair
Yielding to nothing
Serving the almighty dollar
College is for fools
Life's pain delivers the only true scholars
So am I your leader
No I am but a disciple
A higher calling claims my prize
A crown of thorns and my coat
Of many colors my only...
Born and bread
To die young
Too insane to care
Running dirty hands through hair
Dirt on your cleanest face
Smiling with tears cascading
Mascara trails to your broken heart
You stand on fire ,
But drowning in waters of despair
Why is reality so unfair
Yielding to nothing
Serving the almighty dollar
College is for fools
Life's pain delivers the only true scholars
So am I your leader
No I am but a disciple
A higher calling claims my prize
A crown of thorns and my coat
Of many colors my only...
617 reads
3 Comments
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
26th Aug 2015 4:57am
26th Aug 2015 4:57am
Anxious
Can't breathe right
Can't feel right
My chest is tight
Anxiety rises
Can't think
There's no way to escape
There's just no dream in this scape
There's only reality I'm unfulfilled
I'm empty wearing this mask
I play a part I'm not cast for
I wanted more
but have but settled for
I can be with my child here
And so I am stuck I fear
Can't believe I've been clean a year
But feel I've acomplished nothing
But I can't keep running
From the unknown chasing me
A future one so bleak
Now I am near forty and reached my...
Can't feel right
My chest is tight
Anxiety rises
Can't think
There's no way to escape
There's just no dream in this scape
There's only reality I'm unfulfilled
I'm empty wearing this mask
I play a part I'm not cast for
I wanted more
but have but settled for
I can be with my child here
And so I am stuck I fear
Can't believe I've been clean a year
But feel I've acomplished nothing
But I can't keep running
From the unknown chasing me
A future one so bleak
Now I am near forty and reached my...
572 reads
4 Comments
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
11th Aug 2015 8:55pm
11th Aug 2015 8:55pm
Aliens
Vgg what does it take
Before I break
Keep pushing
Your fucking fake
Did you think you could pretend
I lie as i you defend
Fuck you fuck your face
Your a body snatched
From outer space
Camelian changer never leaves a trace
Beyond human understanding
But yet again you don't give
Yet here before me demanding
Hand out expecting
My needs neglecting
My thoughts infecting
All the while human hearts
Your here dissecting
Faking emotions perfecting
Mirrors of deep pools
Using our features as tools
Spinning us up in...
Before I break
Keep pushing
Your fucking fake
Did you think you could pretend
I lie as i you defend
Fuck you fuck your face
Your a body snatched
From outer space
Camelian changer never leaves a trace
Beyond human understanding
But yet again you don't give
Yet here before me demanding
Hand out expecting
My needs neglecting
My thoughts infecting
All the while human hearts
Your here dissecting
Faking emotions perfecting
Mirrors of deep pools
Using our features as tools
Spinning us up in...
486 reads
0 Comments
LOVE POEM
Published
11th Aug 2015 00:45am
11th Aug 2015 00:45am
Forbidden
Sadness darkens night
tears fall and blind my sight
I gave up on trying to fight
You left without a word
No reason just lay waste
You beneath my caste
I was stupid you were a waste
And yet I long for just one more taste
Saying you cared was a lie
All we shared and you can't try
Just move on without a care
To let you back in I wouldn't dare
To let anyone in again never
So they too could wreak havoc and destroy I'm not a plastic useable toy
I haven't the energy desire or ability
To allow another that power over me
The ability to...
tears fall and blind my sight
I gave up on trying to fight
You left without a word
No reason just lay waste
You beneath my caste
I was stupid you were a waste
And yet I long for just one more taste
Saying you cared was a lie
All we shared and you can't try
Just move on without a care
To let you back in I wouldn't dare
To let anyone in again never
So they too could wreak havoc and destroy I'm not a plastic useable toy
I haven't the energy desire or ability
To allow another that power over me
The ability to...
539 reads
0 Comments
OBSERVATIONAL POEM
Published
8th Aug 2015 3:39pm
8th Aug 2015 3:39pm
Clarity clarified
Im all alone with nothing but my thoughts
We all know what thinking can do
Damage ..they say I have issues
Ha that's funny I HAVE FUCKING SUBSCRIPTIONS...
The doctors say they have just the prescriptions
But no I'd rather be cognitive
With an occasional side of dillusion
Than a drooling live veggie tale
I'm no fucking fairy tale
Maybe by Grimm ..
I am not too broken to check my intensity
To test my abiliy mentally
I'm taken with sobriety
My love affair with pain
My undeniable attraction to only
The ones who will hurt me...
We all know what thinking can do
Damage ..they say I have issues
Ha that's funny I HAVE FUCKING SUBSCRIPTIONS...
The doctors say they have just the prescriptions
But no I'd rather be cognitive
With an occasional side of dillusion
Than a drooling live veggie tale
I'm no fucking fairy tale
Maybe by Grimm ..
I am not too broken to check my intensity
To test my abiliy mentally
I'm taken with sobriety
My love affair with pain
My undeniable attraction to only
The ones who will hurt me...
598 reads
0 Comments
STORY POEM
Published
30th Jul 2015 10:01am
30th Jul 2015 10:01am
My first kill
Fuck it fuck this,fuck that
fuck you ..
finger fuck my emotions.
playing silly little games.
Well I have games ..
I'm not saying your names.
but your stupid pig faces
dance in my fucking brain
sick too fuck you fucking stupid
immature fool ,this is my sandbox.
bitch you can't play here .
come and test me ,
you'll end up in misery..
your smile makes Me sick,
you can go eat a dick .
your fucking stupid ..
fuck yourFUCKIN face
Fuck my fuckin loyalty ,
fuck our friendship.
you are worthless
selfish and a...
fuck you ..
finger fuck my emotions.
playing silly little games.
Well I have games ..
I'm not saying your names.
but your stupid pig faces
dance in my fucking brain
sick too fuck you fucking stupid
immature fool ,this is my sandbox.
bitch you can't play here .
come and test me ,
you'll end up in misery..
your smile makes Me sick,
you can go eat a dick .
your fucking stupid ..
fuck yourFUCKIN face
Fuck my fuckin loyalty ,
fuck our friendship.
you are worthless
selfish and a...
644 reads
3 Comments
DU Poetry : Submissions by diablia363 (Alisha Ranstrom)
