The Oil Stone Workshop - Triolet
Okay ... I went trolling about town looking for a good used book featuring triolets ...
... Tried a book store in my old nabe. I remember as a kid trying to steal a book from there because my mom didn't have the cash for me. The owner caught me and let me have the book. He reasoned there were worse things I could be stealing besides a book.
... Tried the famous Strand Bookstore ... nothing reasonably priced - but got some great mangos from a street vendor - some THC laced lollipops also from a street vendor ... a bootleg CD featuring Tupac for $1.00 ... a book of poetry titled THE LUNATIC (Pulitzer Prize winner) by Charles Simic; and "skirts and slacks" by W.S. Di Piero
(I have a feeling Simic's work is gonna be so me)
... but I digress - still looking ... Next stop the library.
... Tried a book store in my old nabe. I remember as a kid trying to steal a book from there because my mom didn't have the cash for me. The owner caught me and let me have the book. He reasoned there were worse things I could be stealing besides a book.
... Tried the famous Strand Bookstore ... nothing reasonably priced - but got some great mangos from a street vendor - some THC laced lollipops also from a street vendor ... a bootleg CD featuring Tupac for $1.00 ... a book of poetry titled THE LUNATIC (Pulitzer Prize winner) by Charles Simic; and "skirts and slacks" by W.S. Di Piero
(I have a feeling Simic's work is gonna be so me)
... but I digress - still looking ... Next stop the library.
(0n MMA artist Conner McGregor)
He said, Doubt is only removed by action
If you're not working then that's where doubt comes in.
So I stir my soul pushing out distractions
He said, Doubt is only removed by action.
Breaking another man's will my concealed attraction
Delivered by combinations that come sudden
He said, Doubt is only removed by action
If you're not working then that's where doubt comes in.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/83d5de59bd2ce32d16a4a6c03406a2b7/tumblr_mzodrubto51ry1rm7o4_r1_400.gif
This is not my entry piece - I just wanted to crank something out to play with the format ...
I tried straight forward rhyme schemes but not sure if I should "bend the words" as Eminem says ...
Craic is right, simple is Best!
He said, Doubt is only removed by action
If you're not working then that's where doubt comes in.
So I stir my soul pushing out distractions
He said, Doubt is only removed by action.
Breaking another man's will my concealed attraction
Delivered by combinations that come sudden
He said, Doubt is only removed by action
If you're not working then that's where doubt comes in.
http://38.media.tumblr.com/83d5de59bd2ce32d16a4a6c03406a2b7/tumblr_mzodrubto51ry1rm7o4_r1_400.gif
This is not my entry piece - I just wanted to crank something out to play with the format ...
I tried straight forward rhyme schemes but not sure if I should "bend the words" as Eminem says ...
Craic is right, simple is Best!
dislocation of his will is sought
bartered with blood that I'll spill
supplication in my eyes is nought
dislocation of his will is sought
borne of fury's wake he has wrought
hollowed echoes do run shrill
dislocation of his will is sought
bartered with blood that I'll spill
... yeah I have deep seeded anger issues
... best sedated by weed - bourbon and Lena
bartered with blood that I'll spill
supplication in my eyes is nought
dislocation of his will is sought
borne of fury's wake he has wrought
hollowed echoes do run shrill
dislocation of his will is sought
bartered with blood that I'll spill
... yeah I have deep seeded anger issues
... best sedated by weed - bourbon and Lena
Anonymous
Just as a query, LSP, it was my understanding that triolet lines had an equal amount of syllables. Have I got that wrong? I know that they can be more syllables than the typical 8, I just thought that all the lines in a triolet had equal amounts?
Edit: on further research, apparently they don't have to be equal. No wonder it was so bloody hard when I wrote mine!
Ah well, I've learned something else about them today.
Edit: on further research, apparently they don't have to be equal. No wonder it was so bloody hard when I wrote mine!
Ah well, I've learned something else about them today. Miss_Sub said:Just as a query, LSP, it was my understanding that triolet lines had an equal amount of syllables. Have I got that wrong? I know that they can be more syllables than the typical 8, I just thought that all the lines in a triolet had equal amounts?
Edit: on further research, apparently they don't have to be equal. No wonder it was so bloody hard when I wrote mine! Ah well, I've learned something else about them today.
I try to keep syllable counts the same when I write rhyming pieces (not my forte) ... I find it just gives the whole thing a better flow. 9 beats can work with ten or eleven, but 9 and 15, probably not.
I'm just testing the waters in the blowup kiddie pool for now, until I can jar out a decent competition piece.
Edit: on further research, apparently they don't have to be equal. No wonder it was so bloody hard when I wrote mine!
Ah well, I've learned something else about them today. I try to keep syllable counts the same when I write rhyming pieces (not my forte) ... I find it just gives the whole thing a better flow. 9 beats can work with ten or eleven, but 9 and 15, probably not.
I'm just testing the waters in the blowup kiddie pool for now, until I can jar out a decent competition piece.
Anonymous
Oh no, quite glad you did step into the pool. You taught me something anyway.
Excellent examples of triolets bending the typical form of the 8 syllable restraints, Lobo, and thanks for the tips.
Missy and Lobo have raised some interesting points regarding the syllable count and rhythm. I don't normally count syllables or devote time trying to engineer a poem with stresses and meter, however subconsciously I'm indirectly testing the meter and flow by reading a poem out aloud, and rearranging and selecting words that give a poem it's own subtle internal rhythm. Exploring older forms and styles of verse like the triolet, forces the writer to think about technique, breaking down what many poets already do by instinct.
The cool thing about the triolet is it's rhyming structure and the flexibility to vary the syllable count, allowing the writer to push for a little more complexity in the form, maintaining rhythm whilst making the poem less predictable to the reader.
[side note: impressive display of mental strength and patience by Connor McGregor on the weekend... they breed them tough in Ireland, for sure!]
Missy and Lobo have raised some interesting points regarding the syllable count and rhythm. I don't normally count syllables or devote time trying to engineer a poem with stresses and meter, however subconsciously I'm indirectly testing the meter and flow by reading a poem out aloud, and rearranging and selecting words that give a poem it's own subtle internal rhythm. Exploring older forms and styles of verse like the triolet, forces the writer to think about technique, breaking down what many poets already do by instinct.
The cool thing about the triolet is it's rhyming structure and the flexibility to vary the syllable count, allowing the writer to push for a little more complexity in the form, maintaining rhythm whilst making the poem less predictable to the reader.
[side note: impressive display of mental strength and patience by Connor McGregor on the weekend... they breed them tough in Ireland, for sure!]
Anonymous
I think I found the syllable count thing hard when I was writing my triolet, because I'm a lot like you in the sense I read things out loud to see how they sound. In fact I read all poems out loud before I leave a comment on somebody's poem. It's actually an interesting experience in itself to restrict your syllable count, if only to push yourself out of that constant audio checking bubble.
I've had a crack at the typical 8 syllable triolet.
the rattle of little bullets will kill the pain
after the bloodbath is over
it's time to take another pill
lock, reload and run for cover
after the bloodbath is over
yield the madness from your lover
with tears to cleanse the blood you spill
after the bloodbath is over
it's time to take another pill
the rattle of little bullets will kill the pain
after the bloodbath is over
it's time to take another pill
lock, reload and run for cover
after the bloodbath is over
yield the madness from your lover
with tears to cleanse the blood you spill
after the bloodbath is over
it's time to take another pill
Anonymous
i enjoy the counting of syllables, but hate rhyming. makes for a challenge and forces you to think of words that are not normally at your fingertips. or at least that's how i am. when i was writing mine, i found that i actually appreciate the rhyming and refrain in the triolet quite a bit. you get a good refrain going, and it packs a punch. i'm still waiting on my thomas hardy book. apparently it was in stock and now it's not. i've been googling like a madwoman,
and i wasn't aware of the not-so-strict-syllable rule until this morning!
and i wasn't aware of the not-so-strict-syllable rule until this morning!
I could not copy your exact books, however I found some online.. I spent two days
reading and researching Triolets and let me tell you Case, it was not an easy challenge
But I love it!! Good luck to all who enter..
Here is what inspired me to write my Triolet....
My Heart Residing in Thy Chest
In response to Shelly's, "The Indian Serenade".
For, break it shall and so it must
My heart residing in thy chest
When placed in care of lover's trust
For, break it shall and so it must
Passion's ashes returned to dust
This lonely heart is laid to rest
For, break it shall and so it must
My heart residing in thy chest
Copyright © 2003 Dan Tharp
HEXED
Dark Wiccan Princess, deep green eyes
Upon their deaths their husbands wept
she killed her sisters, for lust and pride
Dark Wiccan Princess, deep green eyes.
Deep in the earth, her secret dies
Fours Wiccans Sitters laid to rest.
Dark Wiccan princess, deep green eyes
Upon their deaths their husbands wept .
reading and researching Triolets and let me tell you Case, it was not an easy challenge
But I love it!! Good luck to all who enter..
Here is what inspired me to write my Triolet....
My Heart Residing in Thy Chest
In response to Shelly's, "The Indian Serenade".
For, break it shall and so it must
My heart residing in thy chest
When placed in care of lover's trust
For, break it shall and so it must
Passion's ashes returned to dust
This lonely heart is laid to rest
For, break it shall and so it must
My heart residing in thy chest
Copyright © 2003 Dan Tharp
HEXED
Dark Wiccan Princess, deep green eyes
Upon their deaths their husbands wept
she killed her sisters, for lust and pride
Dark Wiccan Princess, deep green eyes.
Deep in the earth, her secret dies
Fours Wiccans Sitters laid to rest.
Dark Wiccan princess, deep green eyes
Upon their deaths their husbands wept .
Anonymous
Zazzles, the last two lines need fixing to match the first two. You've got "Princesses" instead of "Princess", "eye" instead of "eyes" and "death" instead of "deaths". Just a casual observation. 
Anonymous
another crack at this lovely form:
do not open your eyes, dear one.
let your body do the seeing.
my fingers will work to have you undone.
do not open your eyes, dear one.
there is no use, looking for the sun,
death by my hand will be freeing.
do not open your eyes, dear one.
let your body do the seeing
do not open your eyes, dear one.
let your body do the seeing.
my fingers will work to have you undone.
do not open your eyes, dear one.
there is no use, looking for the sun,
death by my hand will be freeing.
do not open your eyes, dear one.
let your body do the seeing
Anonymous
Another practice triolet:
A drink in hand, I pray, and weep
And gather thoughts before I fly
I've miles to go before I sleep,
A drink in hand, I pray, and weep.
I've kissed the demons of the deep
for I am not afraid to die:
A drink in hand, I pray, and weep
And gather thoughts before I fly.
A drink in hand, I pray, and weep
And gather thoughts before I fly
I've miles to go before I sleep,
A drink in hand, I pray, and weep.
I've kissed the demons of the deep
for I am not afraid to die:
A drink in hand, I pray, and weep
And gather thoughts before I fly.
