assault and battery: supervillains

so what, just because we're lazy, noncommittal and indifferent to hoarding those top critiquer tie pins, we don't get our chance?

http://deepundergroundpoetry.com/forum/competitions/read/5513/

STRIKE BACK AND STEAL THE CROWN

or you know just explain why you dont need the pissy crown anyway
can be related to a supervillain i guess. i mean of course it has to. i mean ok if you want but make it original.
those with more than 25 trophies need not apply

HAVE NO FEAR I WILL NOT BE JUDGING THIS


it is time to vote.

the 3 winners will have the chance to go up against the 3 superheros from lav's comp.

you have as many votes as you can bribe me to accept

Thanks for starting this one, Anna--I had intended to, but I can't get another one going yet until I close out the "First Win", which I am unable to do as the website is experiencing technical difficulties....

i sent u a pm

Got it--thanks! :)

"My Super Heroically-delusional Asshole Brother."
Anti-super hero...


Flies in with his flamboyance in a suit that even the gayest man might find awkwardly repulsive.
He sprints up to my tired 83 year old Dad and uses his 1st mighty power against him.

Boss-hoggs-his way back into his heart and home against my Dads better judgement.  All along telling me don't compare my childishness with yours.    

His next power is that of object manipulation.  Now you see my Dads tools in his garage then after word now you never again see them ever.....

The ultimate villainous coward....  Having a cakey Government job he can retire from in a few years isn't enough to fill his empty and hungry heart.  He needs more and more and more.  Much worse than a high maintenance Kardashian on a spending frenzy.  As if the World was ending and some buying spree of more things will lesson the end-results.


Another power he holds near and dear is being a Christian when its convenient to look moral and just.  Maybe not so much a power more like a gimmick.

And finally his one power he needs to work on but is the weakest at.  Is giving me the guilt trip...Something this dick head will never learn 2 do...   2 lazy

He also hires his henchmen usually ex-carny's or ex-cons!  As
long as they have a record and a bad one the game is on!
Scented with the smell of hash he goes to work like a mad man
on bath salts and crack.  Cutting through electric wires while
they are live and saying he knows what hes doing.  An insane out of control psycho demolitions toiler.  The fact he has lived so long another mystery beyond comprehension perchance of God's doing....

Hancock

Hero.
What's really in a name?
More a question of what people are willing to accept
and continue to accept
than it is a line where the chosen few step up from the crowd
parting ways with the lesser in plain view of the public.
The candidates are inexact, grey blurs of character
seen running through grey alleys on a dark days.
They soar and then fade
riding the fickle wind of favor.

All a hero really needs is judgement
and action,
acting upon the belief
that justice is a deep-seated instinct.
It's more akin to revenge than righteousness.
Sometimes those decisions
come seat-of-the-pants
nobody in sight to help sort the kids throwing rocks
from the men with grenades.

Deep into the crusade to save the English-speaking civilized world
the lights come up
camera rolling
me beating the living piss out of a handicapped kid
who fucked with my law one time too many.
Yeah, I get how that looks.

It always seems to run something like this:
Tuesday, seven percent hero, three villain
five percent addict on a binge,
twelve percent victim
and the remainder gets more complicated.
Those are the good days.

So what now
should I suit up before the next time I lend the proverbial hand?
Am I any more your hero since I've come sober
hating myself no less
just more certain in that conviction?
Better?
Well, it took me to two hells and back
just to get this presentable
this much less uncomfortable.
You don't know what you want
and odds-are it would still be something I could never be.

Fuck you.
This is as good as it's ever going to get
this us
this you and me.

Bad Lieutenant


It was a hunch, my numbers were stacking up
I hadn’t solved a case since I was last sober
and the suspects I hunted down wound up dead
before I could give them their last rights.
I was told my soul was lost in a poker game
and once I was DOA from a drive-by the deal was done.


Bullet holes wept with sour mash whiskey
sealed with burns from a Lucky Strike kiss.
Equipped with Murumasa pump-action shotgun, I am
his slave and renegade enforcer torn from the underbelly.
I am the walking dead-cop in a covenant of light
and shadow hunter devoured by night.


I’m the darkness crawling out from under your bed
armed shadow with weapon pointed at your neck
and when that morning glory shines
between the cracks in the blind
Murumasa’s shot will materialize
severing your head from your spine
as silent as the “fuck you”
whispered from my rotting breath
and the instant you realize
you’ve been fucked by God’s hand, cause you flew too high…
every pint of your heroism will be sprayed on the walls
pumping shot after shot till every blessed round is spent.


When you hear tomorrow’s front page
screaming bloody murder as it hits the streets
“Another Dead Super Hero – Fall of the Wolverine!”
You best be wary of me lurking in the shadows,
cause if you see me walking in the light…
It’s already too late.



Written by Alexander Case

DOA: Dead On Arrival

"The glory of light"
So they think I am powerless?
All because I hide so quietly in shadows..
How cliche' to think good guys always win
I'm yearning for the right time to revolt
Against them
Those who stand for "good"
Who are you to say that?
Maybe we just fight for a different cause
And mine is just more twisted than yours
So I'll get their attention
I'll cause a scene
And I'll make sure that I'm seen
Just so they know who I am
And if they don't stop me,
I'll do it again
Just to get their undivided attention
They'll see me
Even blinded by the glory of all that light
I'll casually offend them
And I'll violently end them
Just to prove a point
That not all who defy are evil
And not all who are different mean harm
So I'll counter all thoughts
And bare all my arms
To prepare myself against the light of glory

alllllllright keep em comin

meantime, you get 1 vote per pm. fucking vote, ok. i'll do a shuffle around and make the one i wanted to win wins anyway. no, dont' take me seriously i will be serious about it and fair and just i promise. but get of your ass and vote.

and if you won't vote at least enter the competition

i've got 1 person voting,
u kno who u r.

what is this? read the 5 (only 5!) entries, it's not so hard, pick whichever one scratches your balls right and vote

if i were a super anti-hero
my super anti-power would be
very much the same as it is
right now in real life
every woman i flirt with
would convince me she likes me
have me taker her on a date, try to fuck my
best friend, and tell me how
we should be friends

that's right kids i'm captain friendzone
and i, i would have to tell them
that i have quite enough friends to be getting on
and that i really just want to fuck
but no! captain friendzone would never say that

the only reason i consider myself a villain
is the villain never gets the girl

thank you caxton

Good evening Mr blonde
pity you must die
tonight I reveal my plans
My spoonraker gun
will be full of sexual innuendo
All the girls will lineup
for a shot on my lap rocket

Hypothetically I don't want to beat around the bush
this is the get your fuck on thread?

er... thank you... carpe...