Beautiful liar

 
She looked at herself and thought,
"One day, I'll be beautiful. "
And she knew she would be
Cause she always liked  
what she wld see
And everything was fine

Until they told her it wasn't
She couldn't understand why
They told her she shld lose some weight
She said that she would try


Then She stopped looking at herself
No longer liked what she would see
Drew dark black lines underneath her eyes
Shut off her heart,
Opened her mind.

No one ever asked,
But she was doing just fine.

She started spending more an more time alone
Went to school by herself, and the same way she came home
Holding tight onto a world that was slipping from her grasp,
First her friends, then the grades
Everything kept falling fast
They noticed something was different
Attempted to throw a line
But they never second guessed her
When she said she was just fine

It was fine when he kissed her
It didnt matter where they were
Her first kiss didn't have to be special
In fact, shed rather it be a blur

It was fine when she lost it to a boy she didnt love
Though she never realized he'd take  much more than she wanted to give up

She was fine when alcohol became more than just for fun
It helped her play the game,
and she believed she always won

She was fine when one guy quickly turned into ten
She was fine with the fact that she was constantly used by men
She was fine when a drunk night ended up with her in tears
She was fine when every night her thoughts began to drown her in her fears

She was fine all the time,
even if she had to lie
Because she'd rather wear the mask than to let them see her cry

And Everythjng was going well
She put on her smile
So theyd never tell
That maybe her eyes
weren't as bright as they seemed
Her smile not as honest
as they'd once believed.

And when he saw that smile,
I guess he couldn't resist
He passed her a drink,
it was enough for a kiss
But the night went on,
and he gave her a few more
Which is why it was fine
when he closed that door.

She knew in her head,
this was her game they were playing
Which is why it was fine
when she heard herself saying
This was as far as she would go
But he didnt stop there
She could've sworn she said "no"
Yet she tried not to care

And when it was over
she was just fucking fine
Cause He was playing her game
She was still winning,
Right?

So when they found her lying motionless
On the cold bathroom floor
A note left in her hand:
"I couldn't fake it anymore"
They tried to put the pieces together
But they were too caught up in her lies
Couldn't find a trace of darkness
in such beautiful  bright green eyes
Its Sad how things turns out

She always seemed like she was just fine.