again??

i can honestly say i have no clue what happened to me...i was doing great just sorta nervous about the next day beinng the ay i had to go infront of a building i though hated me.....school... iafter a long summer day i rushed into my roomand grabbedit out of my ceiling....and went to the restroom....i brushed it on my skin missing the feeling of itscold surface.....i pushed down and out to ingrave a currve....it pinched me.... imade over 25 lines in a squareuntillnit was dark numb and runny.....it burned.....i winced wattching brown turn white then pink... then red....the red grew soo slowly..... just... one...more...i closed my eyes and quickly pushed threw the light milk chocolate threshold.....it turned red immediatly...tearing throughthe tight brown boundry...it hurt deep inside..... i confused my self....i missed the ache..i liked being numb....again.