True story.  (humor challenge)

Here's a story you never heard before 
My friend was having sex in the room next door
There was moaning and groaning 
I was watching tv ignoring 
Then a loud thump and silence came from the room 
I thought damn they are already through
Quickie is ok, but damn all that moaning you'd think they'd last all damn day 

When all of a sudden a naked man runs from the room 
Screaming I fucked up, she's turning blue
I couldn't help but laugh his pecker was only an inch and a half 


So I Poked my cigaret out and went to see what I could do
Sure enough, my friend is laid out buck naked on the floor, blood on her forehead 
Already coming too

So I ask. What did this bastard do to you
She screams he missed my hole and hit my anus. it hurt so bad I flew across the room and smacked my head on the side table.

Biting back my laugh I say 
Well at least it wasn't fatal