Damn I need to let go

I was broken down beyond pain
heartache seemed like nothing
because where I was at
I had a knife to my neck

You, made me crazy
I fought a battle that was long lost
I made my depression worst
my heart almost had burst

I wanted to die from the pain
I never saw darker days
I finally found an escape
I was reluctant to take

I felt this pull to you
I still feel it even now
I may have got away
but you have followed somehow

I had to let you go
even when the battle turned in my favor
I was still healing and I couldn't do it
I told a broken girl I loved, that I couldn't be with her

God, it hurts, I still have that pull
It still breaks my heart
You are now so much different
that chasing you now would be a lost from the start

I still am hurting
I am going back down to darkness
I pray I see the sun again
because that is the only hope I can get