deepundergroundpoetry.com
I Am A Cobbled Inamorata
Hidden in the invisible cities of you
my heart was immortal
I felt you long before you were ever there
like your old soul's hand was always on my shoulder
& my heart was too young to know a thing
about fractured innocence
Ancient scripture spoke of your eyes
& the gods were always smiling
in the rapture of my love
my heart was immortal
I felt you long before you were ever there
like your old soul's hand was always on my shoulder
& my heart was too young to know a thing
about fractured innocence
Ancient scripture spoke of your eyes
& the gods were always smiling
in the rapture of my love
Published 15th Apr 2010
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1
reading list entries 1
comments 5
reads 856
Commenting Preference:
The author has chosen not to accept new comments at this time.
15th Apr 2010 12:02pm
this is absolutely beautiful :)
I love your metaphors! And while it's short, it's to the point and amazing :)
"Hidden in the invisible cities of you" made me wow - it's perfect!
I love your metaphors! And while it's short, it's to the point and amazing :)
"Hidden in the invisible cities of you" made me wow - it's perfect!
Anonymous
15th Apr 2010 3:19pm
is an almost tangible innocence about this piece, which really moves, you can evoke such fine emotions thru so few words, it amazes meeverytime i read u kandice.Is the first line of the last stanza 'of your' instead of 'your of', im nitpicking ofcoz:-)
15th Apr 2010 4:11pm
and i don't bandy that word around! This type of thing can easily fall into being too sickly sweet, or not quite powerful enough. For me, your piece is perfectly on the button.
16th Apr 2010 4:01am
Arryn ~ you're so sweet, thank you! :)
Priya ~ yes it was supposed to be of your, I didnt even notice & I must go over my pieces a million times before posting. Thank you for the compliment dear.
Emmalina ~ I take your words as such a huge compliment, thank you for taking the time to read & comment. :)
Priya ~ yes it was supposed to be of your, I didnt even notice & I must go over my pieces a million times before posting. Thank you for the compliment dear.
Emmalina ~ I take your words as such a huge compliment, thank you for taking the time to read & comment. :)
23rd Nov 2010 1:25pm
