Wasted Words

He doesn't deserve the words that came out of my mouth.
What he has given to me I did not deserve.
My broken heart will never mend.
He played me like a violin.

I chomped my nails and pulled my hair.
For when I need him he isn't here
What he gave me hurts like hell.
I try to wish it away but my eyes they begin to swell.

Now there are black shades that darken my room.
Like the roses he gave me in the month of June.
Oils of hatred now burn my veins.
Nothing to write about but the games he played.
I let him use me over and over, again and again.

He loved me.
Hurt me.
Left me.
Kicked me down.
I got used to it in time when he came back around.

What he had he gave to me.
It is no longer him it's now me.
Just demented thoughts, in my diary of hell.
The rush of resin and creative ink from my pen.
What he gave to me is here to stay .
No one to blame but these penetrating thoughts in my mind everyday.

He doesn't deserve the words that once came out of my mouth.
" I Love You."

What he has given to me I did not deserve.
My broken heart will never mend.
He played me just like a violin.

Just like his wasted words.
"I Love You"

Just to ease my mind for the time being.

"Thanks."