Bullet in a Barrel

She scoffed and asked me                
where I get my HEROES from                
I snapped and said this                
                 
The bottom of a barrel,                
and then she begged me to tell her where                  
I scraped my air of EGO from                
and out of my mouth fell truth,                
from rotten cells neath the scum                  
beneath the bottom of that same barrel,                
Then she chimed in, pleading me, asking me               
from where                  
did all my EVIL come,              
she'd caught a stench              
                 
Me weeping, somehow managed to hum her this                
From a slug inside a pothole                
beneath the bottom of that barrel's bum              
then seeing my life summed up, I loaded my guns barrel                
and seeing me cry, she watched me die as we sung this                
                 
As she took me for a drive                
I was feeling numb bliss                
enjoying sunny skies                
it was wondrous                
she was wondrous                
a real beauty                
I was hoping for a tongue kiss                
she could see me shooting love                
with dumb eyes                
my heart thunderous                
but she was wooing                
with looks that had me stunned, whipped                
an angel grooming                
I was young, gripped                
by halo moving                
my chest gave off breath of lungs        
fixed, my               
love was looming                
I had felt love, but none this                
blood was blooming                
in my hung tip                
my lap bag removing                
view of my hungerous                
shaft assuming                
what I thought would be                
a smooch                  
followed by a hundred        
turns out                
my antennae needed tuning                
she had other plans and                
swept my fandom      
in an act            
I felt, for her was easy brooming                
I wondered,        
why'd she'd done this                
               
She scoffed and asked me                
where I get my HEROES from                
I snapped and said this                
                 
The bottom of a barrel,                
and then she begged me to tell her where                  
I scraped my air of EGO from                
and out of my mouth fell truth,                
from rotten cells neath the scum                  
beneath the bottom of that same barrel,                
Then she chimed in, pleading me, asking me                
from where                  
did all my EVIL come,              
she'd caught a stench              
                 
Me weeping, somehow managed to hum her this                
From a slug inside a pothole                
beneath the bottom of that barrel's bum                
then seeing my life summed up, I loaded my guns barrel                
and seeing me cry, she watched me die as we sung this                
                 
We drove on and I was shocked now                
thought we had a spark                
thinking why'd I shoot my shot now                
she told me how                
her heart was filled with art                
and she said that I was an empty field, crop ploughed                
I was meat of rotten cow                
her hate for me gave way                
to thoughts loud                
feeling like I'd been shot now                
knocked around                
and what's worse                
we were outta town                
still driving neath a cloud and                
I was holding back tears                
feeling violent now                
remaining silent now                
thinking of how a fist can pow                
my rage insistent now                
couldn't resist                
my mind making lists foul                
behind                
a smile that had dipped to scowl                
my wit had werewolfed into wish to howl                
and I found myself                  
choking a gal                
                 
You could have chosen to lift me up                
or let me down lightly                
you could have not picked me up                  
in your truck                
just to pick me apart and bite me                
you could have not ever known me                
or not turned around                
to spite me                
you could have not                  
asked me about my past                
to use it just to write                  
creep                
you could have acted politely                
you could have been a lady                
kept to yourself                
or behaved delightfully                
                 
I idolize the wrong kind of human                
yes I was born in a can and                
my soul's fuming                
yes I wish I was in demand                
and my mailbox was booming                
yes I should be a proper man                
not demon doomed and                
yes I think I'm better than I am                
and yes I have a crush like any Stan                
and yes I'm made of mush                
and have growing glands                
I follow trails of ghosts                
and to a graveyard I have ran                
but I had feelings for you                
I wished healing for you                
but you had to go and muck it up                
and now I hope you know you fucked it up                
though I know you don't                
I'm only mad because I know I'm awful                
and express myself awfully                
I'm shit, I released my grip                
                 
She scoffed and asked me                
where I get my HEROES from                
I snapped and said this                
                 
The bottom of a barrel,                
and then she begged me to tell her where                  
I scraped my air of EGO from                
and out of my mouth fell truth,                
from rotten cells neath the scum                  
beneath the bottom of that same barrel,                
Then she chimed in, pleading, asking me                
from where                  
did all my EVIL come,              
she'd caught a stench              
                 
Me weeping, somehow managed to hum her this                
From a slug inside a pothole                
beneath the bottom of that barrel's bum                
then seeing my life summed up, I loaded my guns barrel                
and seeing me cry, she watched me die as we sung this                
                 
Goodbye to the world                
goodbye to the girls                
goodbye to bad reviews                
and chicks with hair in curls                
goodbye to bad news                
and my mind swirling                
goodbye to the quiet times                
and a mind unfurling                
goodbye to my old self                
goodbye to all to come                
goodbye to my book shelf                
goodbye to my loaded gun                
cuz it will be smoking                
like it just slept                
with a queen wet                
or a woke king                
goodbye to bad thoughts poking                
sad that I fought and                
found my self to be a baritone                
this a low sing                
this a blue note                
this result of doping                
and lack of groped pheromones                
this is woe is me                
a sad soul                
I hold a pair of those                
no hoping                
I could be spared or show                
any remorse or progress                
or see to chores                
make my mom blessed                
I've lived a dirty mess of                
perpetual regression                
I continue to stress my self                
and all invested                
gotta feed a bullet now                
with hopes to load some depth in                
furrowed brow                
anxious fingers get my steps in                
trigger lingers waiting to be flexed in                
taxi driver in the mirror                
Robert Deniro leering glum                
                 
She scoffed and asked me                
where I get my HEROES from                
I snapped and said this                
                 
The bottom of a barrel,                
and then she begged me to tell her where                  
I scraped my air of EGO from                
and out of my mouth fell truth,                
from rotten cells neath the scum                  
beneath the bottom of that same barrel,                
Then she chimed in, pleading me, asking me                
from where                  
did all my EVIL come,              
she'd caught a stench                
                 
Me weeping, somehow managed to hum her this                
From a slug inside a pothole                
beneath the bottom of that barrel's bum                
then seeing my life summed up, I loaded my guns barrel                
and seeing me cry, she watched me die as we sung this      
the trigger clicked