mind maze

my mind is like a maze.
one second you’re headed down the right path but then bam there’s a wall.
why is this one so hard to escape.
i’m getting claustrophobic.
my hands are shaking
my palms are sweaty
i can feel my heart about to jump out of my chest
i’m scared
now i’m so worked up i can’t tell if my breath is the same as before
i get nervous soon starting to cry
what’s happening
why am i so scared right now
i’ve been doing good it’s been months
my mind starts speaking
not speaking.
screaming.
these thoughts that keep spinning around in circles like the zipper at you’re local fairgrounds.
i’m confused.
i shouldn’t feel this way at this age. i should just now be figuring out what life is all about but instead i worry about what i’m doing for dinner or if i’m even going to eat.
i want to get out.
please get me out of here.
i’m trapped.
no not by a building with four walls or some small cage
my own mind. the thing supposed to be on my side as yet again turned around left stab wounds so deep in my heart there’s no glueing it back together this time.