Samantha

what a strange deranged world  
where the thoughts unfurled  
when my stomach was hurled  
onto the sidewalk  
you said we needed to talk  
and now I've learned  
its no longer my turn  
to be next to  
your heart strings
the feeling it brings
to be suddenly incomplete  
with just the echoes of my impatiently pacinging feet
and the shadows on the wall
well they call to mind the empty stall where I'd crawl appauled
that the absence of patience creates brilliance in the thought
that I may rot if there wasn't somewhere I could spot  
a path winding low where the grass doesn't grow  
the shrill cry of crows begins to bestow this feeling I know  
is below  
all the snow  
in my heart  
when do I start  
to thaw?  
I pray for spring cuz I've been raw so long  
robbed of my song  
I once knew the chords  
now they come out all wrong  
as I disocver time and time again  
my best friend is a bong  
but it never takes too long  
before I'm strong  
the solitude in this icy freezer box belongs  
I keep my locks in bonds  
the keys are in my soul  
or so I'm told and now I know  
there is no way in hell  
to unhinge this door  
I'm an open book no more  
the last chapter I wrote such a bore  
though I tried to explore  
how to deplore  
your sense of keeping score  
you ignored how much I poured into loving you more  
left me on the shore  
with nothing to do  
but never quite be sure  
what was your allure?
but now I've tasted and its bitter sweet
I'm poisioned to my core