semi-colon end parenthesis.

once upon a time
that isn't so very distant
I was afraid
of who I was becoming
and what I was getting myself into.

corrupt images
followed what I knew.
I was still that immature girl
who was unsure about having
a stranger in her strange land.
never wanting to duplicate
the things I viewed upon
the lifeless screen.
never wanting to become
the monster
I was making myself into.

but once upon a time
the reasons there
that I compare it all to
were not right.
and the receiver did not receive
because the abuser didn't deserve it.

and you're not an abuser.
not a user.
you're a lover.

I'm not your cigarette butt.
TRASH
is no longer a word I use
to describe myself.
especially not in your eyes.

once upon a time
I was scared of who I was becoming.
and I didn't think it was right.

but it is right.
it is now.

remember those inhibitions I had?
I've matured since then.
they're gone.
no more reservations.
no more fear.

and this is how I know
that you're worth my firsts.
and everything else that follows.

and suddenly I can't wait.