ignorance

You deserve more than the lost and found family clutched against the pieces of your body
The things you pulled out over and over leaving a hole where the trust should have been
I thought your eyes were beautiful and I saw your ribs when you saw layers of fat. I saw the muscles and you saw worthlessness
I saw the world and you saw hell
You said you couldn’t and I grabbed your scarred wrists as you ran to nothing
Safety in ignorance
I thought I loved you and you thought nobody cared
You felt alone when I held your hand
You can’t rip out your heart and push it back through your skin
She couldn’t spill enough of her past into the trashcan
Sitting alone at night feeling full until there was nothing left but skin and bones.
Laying on the couch her legs crashed against each other
Crying and pretending it would be okay
Taking away everything was never enough
Thin(k) thin(k) thin(k)
She thought she was worth pain when she was really worth my breathe
Soon she had no arms to hug me back
Deterioting in front of the mirror as I stood in the back
She deserted the table and I’d find her curled in a ball keeping herself from comfort for the body she already had.
Soon the pain eased from my skin and I could feel the change even as you left everything behind I had to leave you

I’m sorry I was never one for goodbyes
I held your skeleton hands and ignored the feelings inside I hope you know that your hand was imprinted to mine and burned through my skin when things got hard
I hope you know that I miss you even when you thought nothing was anything
You thought that nobody cared, and I guess that made me nobody