Spit it out, it's an asshole (revised version)

Don't be mad when I get what I want and it's not you
I waited for months, hoping, but you never came through
I sit in agony, holding my feelings like crushed glass
This isn't the first and I know it won't be the last
I swallow my pride much like I swallowed you too
With enough ferver to not let my feelings get through
This toxic love for you is something I hate
I want you so badly, I'm liable to break
Devouring obsession lays me to waste
Forgotten the feeling, forgotten your taste
Without a distraction, it's taken a toll
Ripping my hair out, just take my soul
I carve your name in the roof of my heart
I don't want to be together, can't stand to be apart