the window

the window beckons me every night
so close to it
but i can't
the cold bitter air bites my frigid lips

just a click away
a scream
a fall
a sharp pain
some bright lights
and gone
through

i don't know why
i want to live, but this window
makes me think otherwise

to once more taste blood
but this time
intentionally

opening it every night
feeling the wind turn my face into thin glass
ice

as frigid as my will
why
i ask

do i feel like jumping
not even
flying
out of this window

and simply
dying?

i have no reason

do i want to feel what death is?

is it a sign,
telling me
to die already,
i have a dull future?

the window beckons
but i cannot jump
and it kills me