No hope

I wish upon a star
A star shining in the night
I dream about a world
A place so full of light

A horse that i can ride
A place that I can go
A home to close my eyes
A friend that I could know

I hurt without trying to
I really tried to help
But it all went wrong
My thoughts all went to hell

Hate from those I love
Pain within my heart
Mistakes made I know that
I broke the soul apart

I constantly regret things
I question my mind
I believe I am the problem
So I'm better left behind

A secret never told
The thing I fear the most
The nightmares I would have
The feeling of a ghost

Because I am invisible to eyes
Never seen for who I am
Hidden from the public
A lonely, forgotten man

I'm not a hero
I'm not a legend
I'm the one untold
Forgotten past and unsure present

I read some books
I listen to the silence
I stop talking entirely
Untouched gold and I'm King Midas

I'm not saying I'm amazing
Because I can't tell that lie
I am shy and I'm alone
Not much would change if I would die

I can't explain my life
I can't explain my story
I think that I'd never known
Stuck in misery and never glory

I write but yet I don't believe
I don't see a damn thing in me
All my words and emotions
Why can't I ever see

I think I'm a failure
I'd give anything for my family
I'm a loser and a disgrace
The unfortunate calamity

I don't cry for my life
I don't think I deserve much
So here I lay and breathe
Never dreaming of a touch

So I'm done with this work
Just what I had thought
I am each and every word
But a writer I am not