the storm

It's raining again.I always knew it could
wash away a multitude of sins.
But not only that,the rain is somehow a
soothing reminder that God is on my side.
i can reflect on my yesterday and
contemplate on my tomorrows.
It's hiding my tears and washing away my sorrows.
Soaked and muddied dirt paths...
synonymous with my pain of situations
that didn't last.
no need to dwell on such things,
yet still i ponder.
My sobs turn into helpless screams!
Only to be drowned out by thunder.

Now comes the flood,like the overwhelming
thoughts that enter my mind.
Irritability gives way to my frustration
Of knowing that i'm wasting time.
I reach out for a helping hand,
only to be forced back into this...
cold water that pulls me into the abyss.
My lungs are filled with desperate attempts to breathe.
The chances i took to make a break,
yet i'm back in the same hole left to grieve.
I cry out to the Lord...if you hear me,
if you care about what i do,
Why can't you deliver me
from hell and unto you?
Just as i surrender,and accept my horrible fate,
i'm suddenly comforted by the thought
that its not too late.
Strangely,i still want to give up,
hoping that my end is near.
a faint,yet magnificent voice
whispers in my ear...
'This is only a test,and you have yet to know,
what pain really is.
But going through it helps you grow.
Don't question your plight,nor ask why...
For you haven't even earned the chance to die...'