deepundergroundpoetry.com
A New Beginning
Day by day I wither away...
As pain and sorrow reach the brim of my glass,
I take a breath, close my eyes, and hope these feelings will pass.
Emotions rise and I lose myself again,
Spilling drops of sorrow from deep within.
And just as I'm sure that this will be the death of me,
Could it be?
A light at the end of my darkened path.
A sudden change is set in motion,
As if I drank a magic potion.
Love takes control of my heart and soul,
As waves of happiness pass over me and blanket me in an ocean of pure bliss.
As pain and sorrow reach the brim of my glass,
I take a breath, close my eyes, and hope these feelings will pass.
Emotions rise and I lose myself again,
Spilling drops of sorrow from deep within.
And just as I'm sure that this will be the death of me,
Could it be?
A light at the end of my darkened path.
A sudden change is set in motion,
As if I drank a magic potion.
Love takes control of my heart and soul,
As waves of happiness pass over me and blanket me in an ocean of pure bliss.
Published 18th Jan 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 7
reading list entries 0
comments 11
reads 1204
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
18th Jan 2012 2:00am
weaves in and out of solid work mixed with reaches for rhyme. too much punctuation! then you kill it with and, and, and at the end... while, as or a host of other options await you. take the time to enhance your vocab and this brilliance will shine!
18th Jan 2012 2:13am
I really appreciate the honest criticism and the compliment. I will keep what you said in mind. I actually changed a part near the end before I published it. I guess it was better the way I had it before; I changed it back now. I believe I've gotten a tad better since I wrote this though, this was one of the first poems I ever wrote :)
4th Feb 2012 2:08pm
I appreciate the optimistic approach,It so even difficult to breathe i understand completely.
4th Feb 2012 5:28pm
Anonymous
20th Feb 2012 5:45pm
i liked this poem it spoke of truth to me
20th Feb 2012 9:19pm
Anonymous
21st Apr 2012 4:40pm
Felt I was on a rollercoaster ride, the emotions were up and down. You did a very nice job. Kept me thinking.
24th Apr 2012 3:58am
Anonymous
14th Sep 2014 2:31pm
Did love save the day for you then Jimmy? If so, then there's hope for us all!
3rd Jan 2019 3:41am
3rd Jan 2019 5:32am
