deepundergroundpoetry.com
IS THE MIND A BLISS ?
IS THE MIND A BLISS ?
Holidays, l fear your starts as you have ends.
Once you start, l expect you to end so soon.
What is life on earth but just a gala day ?
Once we see the starting dawn it turns to dusk.
Lord, You love the creatures that You made on earth.
You became the Good Shepherd That carried lambs.
But You love the feeble man; You love the weak,
and man's trespass gives him mind and turns him frail.
Sympathy has filled Your life for minded man,
who can think of what all men will proceed through.
Creatures that share man his earth do not care much
as no mind will torture them with death sad view.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________________________________
Holidays, l fear your starts as you have ends.
Once you start, l expect you to end so soon.
What is life on earth but just a gala day ?
Once we see the starting dawn it turns to dusk.
Lord, You love the creatures that You made on earth.
You became the Good Shepherd That carried lambs.
But You love the feeble man; You love the weak,
and man's trespass gives him mind and turns him frail.
Sympathy has filled Your life for minded man,
who can think of what all men will proceed through.
Creatures that share man his earth do not care much
as no mind will torture them with death sad view.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________________________________
Published 24th Nov 2019
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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30th Nov 2019 6:09pm
There is absolutely no connection between the title of your piece and the text that you have submitted under it. Where do you discuss whether the mind is a bliss, even if being "a bliss" makes sense.
And it is simply not true that once we see the starting dawn, the dawn turns to dusk.
Nor is it true that a day that turns to dusk cannot be a gala day. That a day ends, does not mean that it had no festive character.
Notably, your claim that "Creatures that share man his earth do not care much" is deictic, since it is unclear just what it is that creatures don't care much about, and your claim that "no mind will torture them (i.e., creatures that share the earth with human beings) with death [sic] sad view" is nonsensical since the idea that some disembodied mind is something that could torture animals is ludicrous as is the idea that animals have no awareness of death and its dangers.
What is the purpose of this all tell no show piece. Why do you think that this is poetry, not to mention a fine example of poetry at its best?
And it is simply not true that once we see the starting dawn, the dawn turns to dusk.
Nor is it true that a day that turns to dusk cannot be a gala day. That a day ends, does not mean that it had no festive character.
Notably, your claim that "Creatures that share man his earth do not care much" is deictic, since it is unclear just what it is that creatures don't care much about, and your claim that "no mind will torture them (i.e., creatures that share the earth with human beings) with death [sic] sad view" is nonsensical since the idea that some disembodied mind is something that could torture animals is ludicrous as is the idea that animals have no awareness of death and its dangers.
What is the purpose of this all tell no show piece. Why do you think that this is poetry, not to mention a fine example of poetry at its best?
