Teeth stained red

Unable to picture a life without relief
Growing exhausted in attempt to hide grief
Today nobody will know what’s behind
My eyes learning to properly mask an ill mind
Smiling at the wall practicing a laugh
To give off the appearance I am still intact

Forcing food to go down when my mouth remains dry at the thought of my teeth in stains
Darkened with red drops of blood
Freshly coughed as more flood
Disappearing into itself my body is aching
Thoughts constantly back to the pills keep me shaking

Meditate more close that fucking drawer
Today I won’t take anything for sure
Sleep hide the phone
Forget that you’re utterly alone
Fight through the minute onto an hour
Increase after that attain power

The longer I last will impact self control
But im losing myself deeper down the hole
Frustrated at my lack of willpower relapsing faster
Than i could’ve ever meant with my days in disaster