What I Did Today

I tried to kill myself today
But not in the usual way
I didn't use any bullets or blades
no pills to pop, no rope to hang
Just sat alone, existing in the fray

The sickening sound of silence
sucking at my soul
Making me want to scream,
choking on smoke from coal

I tried to kill myself today
To fight my brain
and change my ways
look for different things
to end my pain

I'm sorry
I'm not me today
excuse my emotions
they wont go away
I know its queer
Normally I'm smiling and gay

I tried to kill myself today
but I can't complain
I tried to kill myself today
to end my pain
I tried to kill myself today
but I was able to refrain

I tried to kill myself today
But Tomorrow will be a new day.