yeah I made the change

I needed to make the change.
I changed it.
It changed me.
Now im someone I dont want to be.
Im a diffrent person.
Im sad and filled with anger.
The tears fill were laughter use to be.
Tears will never fill the void thats my heart.
30 days clean..
Is all this pain worth it?
It makes the pain grow stronger everyday.
I grow weaker.
Untill I fall into a darknes.
That i cant find my way out of.
My mind stays in a fog.
Before you judge me.
Ask yourself is this someone you want to be?
When I cant even stand looking myself in the mirror,
because im digusted with myself.
For all the shit I put my family through.
I just cant seem to get off this path of distruction,
Theres no light at the end of my tunnel just darkness.
Now i ask myself is it really worth bein clean?
My answer is no.
Instead of 30 days clean.
Now im 1 day high..