Have you felt it?

Have you felt it?
The night was so peaceful it felt like home ... A fluttery fluffy feeling inside just kindling, not too much but just felt right ... You had to be there to see it, feel it and absorb that small moment of bliss ... Once you're in that trance you can't escape it ... You crave it ... But it's not that you have to have it ... You long for it as the pit of your body calls to it, you and something inside of you pulling you gently... A small urging feeling ... Just tugging you and trying to lead you there ... Have you felt it?! It's in that moment ... That moment when you realize everything, yet you feel like you know nothing ... It felt amazing and complete yet empty and grey, confusion and somehow even with friends close ... You still feel alone ... Tell me ... Have you felt it?
It's 2 in the morning and your up like you took a shot of caffeine to the veins ... Or your brain ... Trying to do a marathon ... Even though, at its limit ... Still running and trying to hold on, to finish the race ... Oh if only you can be like your brain ... If only your thoughts are filled with sun shines and happiness and the energy to try ... But it's not ... It's funny how they contrast ... The feeling and thought ... How they can be fooled that you're actually trying to finish it ... They don't know ... They can try to understand but they won't ... Because like that little phrase ... Sticks and stones ... Unless you've gotten called different names you can't tell me that sticks and stones hurt more than bones ... No ... You are awake because the thought are what keeps you up ... It's not that your brain is filled with happiness ... No ... You can't lie anymore ... Because ... You will soon realize ... Your life is not just about you ... What about the people that care about you? The ones that see through you and urge you ... You can't just ... You can't ...
It's now 3 ... The night slithers on ... Snaking through the city, trying to catch it's tail ... And you? You're still up ... Trying to make sense of it all ... Questions in your head which doesn't even make sense to why you even have those questions ... As you sit there ... Looking up to the sky ... Praying to the clouds that they wouldn't mask the moon ... Like you know you would go into deep sorrow if it went missing even for a split second! As you sit there ... You start to feel alone again ... Even though you know there are people who cares deeply for you ... You still feel it ... Eating away slowly ... Ever so slightly that until a chunk is missing ... You wouldn't know what it is ... Inside you, Armageddon ... As your heart twist and turn ... Your stomachs start to constrict and churn as if it's imitating a python and you ... It's prey ... And this pain ... It's not as bad as ... *sigh* ... As I write these feelings, thoughts and what is happening ... I Barely know where this is going ... It was the midst of the night ... And now ... The morning ...
The sun rises ... The rays bore down on you ... Expecting you to get up just like society ... Society expect you to get up and do these things ... And it's that same society that tells you, you can't believe in what you want ... They claim that it's your right yet judges you for doing so ... It's that same society ... That same society that says it's just in your head, get over it ...