I, Myself, and Me

Me? who am I? I myself might add that I stand broken from from the punches thrown by my every mistake.....    
cant hold up my blocks any more....    
every mask "I" wear is cracked and all the costumes worn...    
I've said every joke I could say and received every last laugh but still I'm damaged..    
"I" need to get hammered!!    
maybe one last escapade with clear liquor and cocaine will help me to escape all the mess i made....    
the "Me" hasn't changed.....    
its all about me, I got myself...    
who was there when I was lonely barricaded in by strangers?    
told lies filled with false hope sent out of phony faces ...    
my home was broken, and when they came my mother said take him...    
damn...    
so much for blood ties, i know no father, a caseworker, and pill piles.    
I used to take myself away....    
and drift to a whole home, my mother hugging me, and a hot plate.    
well...so much for dreams....right now... I have the partial 'Me'    
dependent on a high that lies can bring.    
thumb swollen from the flick of the Bic that kills my dreams...    
steals water from the source that fills my seed..    
breaks the hearts of those who stand by "me"....    
breath...    
a broken essence leads to my akward presence in a room filled with..    
old souls trapped in bags with bones.. and dim lights to hide the madness in the eyes of so much sadness...    
how'd this happen....    
in this fashion... i went from the.. man my father wasn't to the    
bag that he was trapped in...    
ashamed to say I fear the change..that will..help me fly and bear the weight.. of a.. man who can finally live...free