Life of Lies

 
I love a man I know not to love
his heart will never be free.
I waste my days, a slave to his ways
knowing he will never love me.

He is the secret I can never reveal
the best lover I ever have known.
I've nothing to give but my body- it's his
fresh dirt for him to bury his bone.

Hopelessly hooked on him like a drug
wanting him day and night.
I play his dirty game..I have no shame
taking it all, knuckles white.

Dead is the conscience I knew so well
and morals.....they ran far away.
Clarity now blurry in a love-drunk slurry-
the 'good me' has gone astray.

To lay with him is like playing with fire
the flames, they burn me alive.
Leaving me marred, hurt and scarred-
the pain on which I thrive.

A fool for punishment, I beg for more
even if all I am worthy of is shit.
Loving him breaks me...it overtakes me
but I'm not willing to quit.

I die a little more with each passing day
until again, I get lost in those eyes....
All doubt goes away, so for now I'll stay
living this life of lies.