Love child

Some would think the way I love you is appalling,
Others may call it sweet.
But no ones heard the so called reason of defeat.
When you left me I was young and scared.
You never got to hear the little heart beat in there.
She would've been beautiful, perfect, and had your curly hair.
I may not have ever knew you, but you were there, I'm sorry I didn't try harder to keep you there.
I could give you a name, but would we agree? Would it just make it harder for me?
Trying to cope alone for so long has been so hard- especially when you ran away for so long.
It may not be anyone fault, we just weren't ready.
But sweet baby when I picture you, you look just like your daddy.